The Mind the Paint Girl | Page 8

UPJOHN, she proceeds
to lay upon the tea-table.
BLAND.
[Moving away to join the others-- to DE CASTRO.] Ha, Sam!
DE CASTRO.
[A stout, coarse, but genial-looking gentleman of forty, of marked
Jewish appearance, speaking with a lisp-- shaking hands with LILY.]
How are you to-day, Lil? Many happy returnth, wunth more.
LILY.
Thanks, dear old boy. [Sitting on the settee in front of the writing-table.]
Did I send you a wire this morning?
DE CASTRO.
Not you; not a thix-pen'north.
LILY.

I ought to have done so, to acknowledge your-- what was it?
DE CASTRO.
A ring-- diamondth and thapphires.
LILY.
Ah, yes; beautiful.
DE CASTRO.
It ith rather a nithe ring. [Lowering his voice.] But I thay.
LILY.
What?
DE CASTRO.
Mind you don't go and tell Gabth, on any account.
LILY.
[With a great assumption of ignorance, raising her eyebrows.] Gabs?
DE CASTRO.
Gabrielle-- Mith Kato.
LILY.
Why shouldn't I?
DE CASTRO.
Nonsenth; you know very well. [Urgently.] You won't, will you?
LILY.

[Shrugging her shoulders.] I won't if I remember not to.
DE CASTRO.
[Alarmed.] Ah, now, don't be thtupid! Whath the good o' making
mithchief! [LILY shows him the tip of her tongue.] Oh, Lil! [GLADYS
goes out.] Lil----!
VON RETTENMAYER.
[Leaving the group at the back and putting an arm round DE
CASTRO'S shoulder.] My dear friend Zam!
DE CASTRO.
How are you, Baron? [Going to MRS. UPJOHN.] Afthernoon, Ma!
[Nodding to JIMMIE and ROPER.] Afthernoon, everybody! [Shaking
hands with JEYES, who has risen and now joins the group.] How are
you, Nicko?
LILY.
[Giving her hand to VON RETTENMAYER.] Excuse me for cutting you
short when you came in. Thanks for your splendid present. I did send
you a wire, didn't I?
VON RETTENMAYER.
[Kissing her hand and bowing over it.] I shall breserve it, with a few
oder souvenirs, till the end of my life.
LILY.
[Withdrawing her hand and blowing the compliment away.] Phew! Lal,
lal, lal, la!
VON RETTENMAYER.
[In an altered tone, after a cautious look round.] Goddess.

LILY.
Eh?
VON RETTENMAYER.
[Anxiously.] My drifling liddle offering-- I endreat you not to mention
it to Enid.
LILY.
[Laughing heartily.] Ha, ha, ha, ha! Another of you!
VON RETTENMAYER.
The gharming Miss Mongreiff.
LILY.
[Seriously.] Baron, I wish you boys wouldn't make me presents and
then ask me to keep them a secret from the other girls.
VON RETTENMAYER.
And I-- I wish it were not nezezzary. But, goddess, you are alzo a
young lady of the world-- you know what women are.
LILY.
H'm! I know what you men are.
[MAUD, a buxom young woman with a good-tempered face, dressed as
a lady's-maid, enters quickly, tying her apron, and runs to LILY. JEYES
comes to the further side of the writing-table and VON
RETTENMAYER now joins him there. JIMMIE BIRCH also comes
forward, accompanied by DE CASTRO.
MAUD.

[To LILY.] Here, give me your things. [LILY tosses her hat, scarf, and
gloves to MAUD.] I was in my room, having a lie down. Is my hair
untidy?
LILY.
I've never seen it anything else.
MAUD.
[Merrily.] Ha, ha, ha! [To JIMMIE and DE CASTRO.] Afternoon, Miss
Jimmie. Afternoon, Mr. de Castro. [To LILY.] Now, don't let them all
tire you to death, there's a pet.
LILY.
Oh, clear out. [As MAUD is departing.] Hi! [Rising and kicking off her
shoes and sending them in MAUD'S direction.] Fetch me a pair of
slippers.
MAUD.
[Picking up the shoes and chuckling.] He, he, he!
[When MAUD reaches the door, which she has left open, GLADYS
appears with the tea-tray and with FARNCOMBE at her heels.
GLADYS.
[To MAUD, in a low voice, witheringly.] Oh, you're doing something,
are you?
MAUD.
[In the same tone, passing GLADYS.] Yes, setting you an example, my
girl. [Encountering FARNCOMBE.] Beg pardon.
[MAUD withdraws, closing the door, and FARNCOMBE stands
looking at LILY, who is talking to JIMMIE. GLADYS carries the tray to

the tea-table.
LILY.
[Become aware of FARNCOMBE'S presence and nodding to him.]
How d'ye do?
FARNCOMBE.
[Moving a step or two towards her.] I-- I've been here before this
afternoon. I ventured to bring you some flowers.
LILY.
[Going to him and shaking hands with him formally.] Nobody told me.
Awfully kind of you. Where have they put them?
FARNCOMBE.
[Lifting his basket of flowers from off the piano and showing it to her.]
Here.
LILY.
Pretty. [Pulling out a carnation.] Stick it up there again. [He replaces
the basket.] You're Lord Farncombe, aren't you?
FARNCOMBE.
Yes.
LILY.
[With a glance at the others.] Know anybody here?
FARNCOMBE.
[Looking round the room.] Nearly everybody, I fancy. [He advances to
VON RETTENMAYER, who comes to meet him. LILY sits upon the

settee by the piano and fastens the carnation in her dress. GLADYS
goes out.] Karl----!
VON RETTENMAYER.
My dear