The Laws of Etiquette | Page 5

place, where
there was nothing to divert their attention from one another, they would
expire of mutual hideousness.
If you have any defect, so striking and so ridiculous as to procure you a
nickname then indeed there is but one remedy,--renounce society.
In the morning, before eleven o'clock even if you go out, you should
not be dressed. You would be stamped a parvenu if you were seen in
anything better than a reputable old frock coat. If you remain at home,
and are a bachelor, it is permitted to receive visitors in a morning gown.
In summer, calico; in winter, figured cloth, faced with fur. At dinner, a
coat, of course, is indispensable.
The effect of a frock coat is to conceal the height. If, therefore, you are
beneath the ordinary statue, or much above it, you should affect frock
coats on all occasions that etiquette permits.
Before going to a ball or party it is not sufficient that you consult your
mirror twenty times. You must be personally inspected by your servant
or a friend. Through defect of this, I once saw a gentleman enter a
ball-room, attired with scrupulous elegance, but with one of his
suspenders curling in graceful festoons about his feet. His glass could
not show what was behind.
If you are about to present yourself in a company composed only of
men, you may wear boots. If there be but one lady present, pumps and
silk-stockings are indispensable.
There is a common proverb which says, that if a man be well dressed as
to head and feet, he may present himself everywhere. The assertion is
as false as Mr. Kemble's voice. Happy indeed if it were necessary to
perfect only the extremities. The coat, the waistcoat, the gloves, and,
above all, the cravat, must be alike ignorant of blemish.
Upon the subject of the cravat--(for heaven's sake and Brummel's,

never appear in a stock after twelve o'clock)--We cannot at present say
anything. If we were to say anything, we could not be content without
saying all, and to say all would require a folio. A book has been
published upon the subject, entitled "The Cravat considered in its moral,
literary, political, military, and religious attributes." This and a clever,
though less profound, treatise on "The art of tying the Cravat," are as
indispensable to a gentleman as an ice at twelve o'clock.
When we speak of excellence in dress we do not mean richness of
clothing, nor manifested elaboration. Faultless propriety, perfect
harmony, and a refined simplicity,--these are the charms which
fascinate here.
It is as great a sin to be finical in dress as to be negligent.
Upon this subject the ladies are the only infallible oracles. Apart from
the perfection to which they must of necessity arrive, from devoting
their entire existence to such considerations, they seem to be endued
with an inexpressible tact, a sort of sixth sense, which reveals
intuitively the proper distinctions. That your dress is approved by a
man is nothing;--you cannot enjoy the high satisfaction of being
perfectly comme il faut, until your performance has received the seal of
a woman's approbation.
If the benefits to be derived from cultivating your exterior do not
appear sufficiently powerful to induce attention, the inconveniences
arising from too great disregard may perhaps prevail. Sir Matthew Hale,
in the earlier part of his life, dressed so badly that he was once seized
by the press-gang. Not long since, as I entered the hall of a public hotel,
I saw a person so villainously habited, that supposing him to be one of
the servants, I desired him to take my luggage upstairs, and was on the
point of offering him a shilling, when I discovered that I was
addressing the Honorable Mr. * * *, one of the most eminent American
statesmen.

CHAPTER III.
SALUTATIONS.
The salutation, says a French writer, is the touchstone of good breeding.
According to circumstances, it should be respectful, cordial, civil,
affectionate or familiar:--an inclination of the head, a gesture with the
hand, the touching or doffing of the hat.
If you remove your hat you need not at the same time bend the dorsal
vertebr' of your body, unless you wish to be very reverential, as in
saluting a bishop.
It is a mark of high breeding not to speak to a lady in the street, until
you perceive that she has noticed you by an inclination of the head.
Some ladies courtesy in the street, a movement not gracefully
consistent with locomotion. They should always _bow._
If an individual of the lowest rank, or without any rank at all, takes off
his hat to you, you should do the same in return. A bow, says La
Fontaine, is a note drawn at sight. If you acknowledge it,