Our Deportment | Page 3

signature--Letters of introduction--When to be given--Notes of
invitation and replies thereto--Acceptances and regrets--Formal
invitations must be answered--Letters of friendship--Love
letters--Business letters and correspondence--Form of letter requesting
employment--Regarding the character of a servant--Forms for notes,
drafts, bills and receipts 242
CHAPTER XXIII.
GENERAL RULES TO GOVERN CONDUCT.
Attention to the young in society--Gracefulness of carriage--Attitude,
coughing, sneezing, etc.--Anecdotes, puns, etc.--A sweet and pure
breath--Smoking--A good listener--Give precedence to others--Be

moderate in speaking--Singing and playing in society--Receiving and
making presents--Governing our moods--A lady driving with a
gentleman--An invitation cannot be recalled--Avoid talking of
personalities--Shun gossip and tale bearing--Removing the
hat--Intruding on privacy--Politeness --Adapting yourself to
others--Contradicting--A woman's good name --Expressing
unfavorable opinions--Vulgarities--Miscellaneous rules governing
conduct--Washington's maxims 266
CHAPTER XXIV.
ANNIVERSARY WEDDINGS.
How and when they are celebrated--The paper, cotton and leather
weddings--The wooden wedding--The tin wedding--The crystal
wedding--The silver wedding--The golden wedding--The diamond
wedding--Presents at anniversary weddings--Forms of invitations, etc.
285
CHAPTER XXV.
BIRTHS AND CHRISTENINGS.
Naming the child--The christening--Godparents or sponsors--Presents
from godparents--The ceremony--The breakfast--Christening gifts--The
hero of the day--Fees 291
CHAPTER XXVI
FUNERALS.
Death notices and funeral invitations--Arrangement for the
funeral--The house of mourning--Conducting the funeral services--The
pall-bearers --Order of the procession--Floral and other
decorations--Calls upon the bereaved family--Seclusion of the family
296

CHAPTER XXVII.
ETIQUETTE AT WASHINGTON.
Social duties required of the President and his family--Receptions at the
White House--Order of official rank--Duties required of members of
the cabinet and their families--How to address officials--The first to
visit 303
CHAPTER XXVIII.
ETIQUETTE OF FOREIGN COURTS.
Foreign titles--Royalty--The nobility--The gentry--Esquires--Imperial
rank--European titles--Presentation at the court of St. James--Those
eligible and ineligible for presentation--Preliminaries--Presentation
costumes 308
CHAPTER XXIX.
BUSINESS.
The example of a merchant prince--Keep your temper--Honesty the
best policy--Form good habits--Breaking an appointment--Prompt
payment of bills, notes and drafts--General suggestions 315
CHAPTER XXX.
DRESS.
Requirements for dressing well--Perils of the love of dress to weak
minds--Consistency in dress--Extravagance--Indifference to
dress--Appropriate dress--The wearing of gloves--Evening or full dress
for gentlemen--Morning dress for gentlemen--Evening or full dress for
ladies--Ball dresses--The full dinner dress--For receiving and making
morning calls--Morning dress for street--Carriage dress--Promenade
dress and walking suit--Opera dress--The riding dress--For women of

business--Ordinary evening dress--For a social party--Dress for the
theater, lecture and concert--Archery, croquet and skating
costumes--Bathing dress--For traveling--The bridal costume--Dress of
bridemaids--At wedding receptions--Mourning dress--How long
mourning should be worn 320
CHAPTER XXXI.
COLORS AND THEIR HARMONY IN DRESS.
The proper arrangement of colors--The colors adapted to different
persons--Material for dress--Size in relation to color and dress--A list
of colors that harmonize 341
CHAPTER XXXII.
THE TOILET.
Importance of neatness and cleanliness--Perfumes--The bath--The teeth
and their care--The skin--The eyes, eyelashes and brows--The hair and
beard--The hands and feet 351
CHAPTER XXXIII.
TOILET RECIPES.
To remove freckles, pimples and sunburn--To beautify the
complexion--To prevent the hair falling out--Pomades and hair
oils--Sea foam or dry shampoo--To prevent the hair turning gray--To
soften the skin--To cleanse the teeth--Remedy for chapped hands--For
corns and chilblains, etc. 372
CHAPTER XXXIV.
SPORTS, GAMES AND AMUSEMENTS.
Archery and its practice--Lawn Tennis--Boating--Picnics--Private
Theatricals--Card playing 398

CHAPTER XXXV.
LANGUAGE OF FLOWERS, 410
CHAPTER XXXVI.
PRECIOUS STONES, 423
CHAPTER I.
Introductory.
"Ingenious Art with her expressive face, Steps forth to fashion and
refine the race."--COWPER.
A knowledge of etiquette has been defined to be a knowledge of the
rules of society at its best. These rules have been the outgrowth of
centuries of civilization, had their foundation in friendship and love of
man for his fellow man--the vital principles of Christianity--and are
most powerful agents for promoting peace, harmony and good will
among all people who are enjoying the blessings of more advanced
civilized government. In all civilized countries the influence of the best
society is of great importance to the welfare and prosperity of the
nation, but in no country is the good influence of the most refined
society more powerfully felt than in our own, "the land of the future,
where mankind may plant, essay, and resolve all social problems."
These rules make social intercourse more agreeable, and facilitate
hospitalities, when all members of society hold them as binding rules
and faithfully regard their observance. They are to society what our
laws are to the people as a political body, and to disregard them will
give rise to constant misunderstandings, engender ill-will, and beget
bad morals and bad manners.
Says an eminent English writer: "On manners, refinement, rules of
good breeding, and even the forms of etiquette, we are forever talking,
judging our neighbors severely by the breach of traditionary and
unwritten laws, and choosing our society and even our friends by the

touchstone of courtesy." The Marchioness de Lambert expressed
opinions which will be endorsed by the best bred people everywhere
when she wrote to her son: "Nothing is more shameful than a voluntary
rudeness. Men have found it necessary as well as agreeable to unite for
the common good; they have made