Our Deportment | Page 2

VI.
ETIQUETTE ON VISITING.
General invitations not to be accepted--The limit of a prolonged
visit--Duties of a visitor--Duties of the host or hostess--True
hospitality--Leave-taking--Invitations to guests--Forbearance with
children--Guests making presents--Treatment of a host's friends 69
CHAPTER VII.
ETIQUETTE OF CARDS.
Visiting and calling cards--Their size and style--Wedding
cards--Leaving cards in calling--Cards for mother and daughter--Cards

not to be sent in envelopes to return formal calls--Glazed cards not in
fashion--P.P.C. cards--Cards of congratulation--When sent--Leave
cards in making first calls of the season and after invitations--Mourning
cards--Christmas and Easter cards--Cards of condolence--Bridegroom's
card. 75
CHAPTER VIII.
CONVERSATION.
Character revealed by conversation--Importance of conversing
well--Children should be trained to talk well--Cultivation of the
memory--Importance of remembering names--How Henry Clay
acquired this habit--Listening--Writing down one's
thoughts--Requisites for a good
talker--Vulgarisms--Flippancy--Sympathizing with another--Bestowing
compliments--Slang--Flattery--Scandal and gossip--Satire and
ridicule--Religion and politics to be avoided--Bestowing of
titles--Interrupting another while talking--Adaptability in
conversation--Correct use of words--Speaking one's mind--Profanity
--Display of knowledge--Double entendres--Impertinent questions
--Things to be avoided in conversation--Hobbies--Fault-finding
--Disputes 84
CHAPTER IX.
DINNER PARTIES.
Dinners are entertainments for married people--Whom to invite--Forms
of invitations--Punctuality required--The success of a dinner
party--Table appointments--Proper size of a dinner party--Arrangement
of guests at table--Serving dinner a la Russe--Duties of
servants--Serving the dishes--General rules regarding dinner--Waiting
on others--Monopolizing conversation--Duties of hostess and
host--Retiring from the table--Calls required after a dinner
party--Returning hospitalities--Expensive dinners not the most
enjoyable--Wines at dinners 106

CHAPTER X.
TABLE ETIQUETTE.
Importance of acquiring good habits at the table--Table appointments
for breakfast, luncheon and dinner--Use of the knife and fork--Of the
napkin--Avoid fast eating and all appearance of greediness--General
rules on the subject 123
CHAPTER XI.
RECEPTIONS, PARTIES AND BALLS.
Morning receptions--The dress and refreshments for
them--Invitations--Musical matinees--Parties in the country--Five
o'clock teas and kettle-drums--Requisites for a successful
ball--Introductions at a ball--Receiving guests--The number to
invite--Duties of the guests--General rules to be observed at
balls--Some suggestions for gentlemen--Duties of an
escort--Preparations for a ball--The supper--An after-call required 129
CHAPTER XII.
STREET ETIQUETTE.
The street manners of a lady--Forming street
acquaintances--Recognizing friends in the street--Saluting a
lady--Passing through a crowd--The first to bow--Do not lack
politeness--How a lady and gentleman should walk together--When to
offer the lady the arm--Going up and down stairs--Smoking in the
streets--Carrying packages--Meeting a lady acquaintance--Corner
loafers--Shouting in the street--Shopping etiquette--For public
conveyances--Cutting acquaintances--General suggestions 145
CHAPTER XIII.
ETIQUETTE OF PUBLIC PLACES.

Conduct in church--Invitations to opera, theatres and concerts--Conduct
in public assemblages--Remain until the performance closes--Conduct
in picture galleries--Behavior at charity fairs--Conduct at an artist's
studio 157
CHAPTER XIV.
TRAVELING ETIQUETTE.
Courtesies shown to ladies traveling alone--Duties of an escort--Duties
of a lady to her escort--Ladies should assist other ladies traveling
alone--The seats to be occupied in a railway car--Discretion to be used
in forming acquaintances in traveling 167
CHAPTER XV.
RIDING AND DRIVING.
Learning to ride on horseback--The gentleman's duty as an escort in
riding--How to assist a lady to mount--Riding with ladies--Assisting a
lady to alight from a horse--Driving--The seat of honor in a
carriage--Trusting the driver 174
CHAPTER XVI.
COURTSHIP.
Proper conduct of gentlemen and ladies toward each other--Premature
declaration of love--Love at first sight--Proper manner of
courtship--Parents should exercise authority over daughters--An
acceptable suitor--Requirements for a happy marriage--Proposals of
marriage--A gentleman should not press an unwelcome suit--A lady's
refusal--A doubtful answer--Unladylike conduct toward a suitor--The
rejected suitor--Asking consent of parents--Presents after
engagement--Conduct and relations of the engaged couple--Lovers'
quarrels--Breaking an engagement 179

CHAPTER XVII.
WEDDING ETIQUETTE.
Choice of bridemaids and groomsmen or ushers--The bridal costume
Costumes of bridegroom and ushers--Presents of the bride and
bridegroom--Ceremonials at church when there are no bridemaids or
ushers--Invitations to the ceremony alone--The latest
ceremonials--Weddings at home--The evening wedding--"At home"
receptions--Calls--The wedding ring--Marriage ceremonials of a
widow--Form of invitations to a reception--Duties of invited guests--Of
bridemaids and ushers--Bridal presents--Master of
ceremonies--Wedding fees--Congratulations--The bridal tour 194
CHAPTER XVIII.
HOME LIFE AND ETIQUETTE.
Home the woman's kingdom--Home companionship--Conduct of
husband and wife--Duties of the wife to her husband--The wife a
helpmate--The husband's duties 208
CHAPTER XIX.
HOME TRAINING.
First lessons learned at home--Parents should set good examples to
their children--Courtesies in the home circle--Early moral training of
children--The formation of their habits--Politeness at home--Train
children for some occupation--Bad temper--Selfishness--Home maxims
216
CHAPTER XX.
HOME CULTURE.
Cultivate moral courage--The pernicious influence of

indolence--Self-respect--Result of good breeding at
home--Fault-finding and grumbling--Family jars not to be made
public--Conflicting interests--Religious
education--Obedience--Influence of example--The influence of books
225
CHAPTER XXI.
WOMAN'S HIGHER EDUCATION.
Its importance--Train young women to some occupation--Education of
girls too superficial--An education appropriate to each sex--Knowledge
of the laws of health needed by women--Idleness the source of all
misery--A spirit of independence--Health and life dependent upon a
higher culture--Cultivation of the moral sense 233
CHAPTER XXII.
THE LETTER WRITER.
Letter writing is an indication of good breeding--Requirements for
correct writing--Anonymous letters--Note paper to be used--Forms of
letters and notes--Forms of addressing notes and letters--Forms of