Our Deportment

Our Deportment

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Title: Our Deportment Or the Manners, Conduct and Dress of the Most
Refined Society
Author: John H. Young

Release Date: January 25, 2006 [eBook #17609]
Language: English
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OUR DEPORTMENT
Or the Manners, Conduct and Dress of the Most Refined Society;
INCLUDING Forms for Letters, Invitations, Etc., Etc. Also, Valuable
Suggestions on Home Culture and Training.
Compiled from the Latest Reliable Authorities,
by
JOHN H. YOUNG, A.M.
Revised and Illustrated.

[Illustration]

F. B. Dickerson & Co., Detroit, Mich. St. Louis, Mo. Pennsylvania
Publishing Co., Harrisburgh, Pa. Union Publishing House, Chicago, Ill.
1881.

[Illustration]
To go through this life with good manners possessed, Is to be kind unto
all, rich, poor and oppressed, For kindness and mercy are balms that
will heal The sorrows, the pains, and the woes that we feel.
[Illustration]
Copyrighted by Freeman B. Dickerson, 1879 and 1881.

[Illustration]

Preface.
No one subject is of more importance to people generally than a
knowledge of the rules, usages and ceremonies of good society, which
are commonly expressed by the word "Etiquette." Its necessity is felt
wherever men and women associate together, whether in the city,
village, or country town, at home or abroad. To acquire a thorough
knowledge of these matters, and to put that knowledge into practice
with perfect ease and self-complacency, is what people call good
breeding. To display an ignorance of them, is to subject the offender to
the opprobrium of being ill-bred.
In the compilation of this work, the object has been to present the
usages and rules which govern the most refined American society, and
to impart that information which will enable any one, in whatever
circumstances of life to acquire the perfect ease of a gentleman, or the
gentle manners and graceful deportment of a well-bred lady, whose
presence will be sought for, and who, by their graceful deportment will
learn the art of being at home in any good society.
The work is so arranged, that every subject is conveniently classified
and subdivided; it is thus an easy matter to refer at once to any given
subject. It has been the aim of the compiler to give minutely all points
that are properly embraced in a work on etiquette, even upon matters of
seemingly trivial importance. Upon some hitherto disputed points,
those rules are given, which are sustained by the best authorities and
endorsed by good sense.
As the work is not the authorship of any one individual, and as no
individual, whatever may be his acquirements, could have the
presumption to dictate rules for the conduct of society in general, it is
therefore only claimed that it is a careful compilation from all the best
and latest authorities upon the subject of etiquette and kindred matters,
while such additional material has been embraced within its pages, as,

it is hoped, will be found of benefit and interest to every American
household.
J.H.Y.
[Illustration]

Contents.
CHAPTER I.
PAGE. INTRODUCTORY 13
CHAPTER II.
MANNERS.
Good manners as an element of worldly success--Manner an index of
character--The true gentleman--The true lady--Importance of
trifles--Value of pleasing manners--Personal appearance enhanced and
fortunes made by pleasing manners--Politeness the outgrowth of good
manners 20
CHAPTER III.
INTRODUCTIONS.
Acquaintances thus formed--Promiscuous, informal and casual
introductions--Introduction of a gentleman to a lady and a lady to a
gentleman--Introduction at a ball--The manner of
introduction--Introducing relatives--Obligatory
introductions--Salutations after introduction--Introducing one's
self--Letters of introduction--How they are to be delivered--Duty of a
person to whom a letter of introduction is addressed--Letters of
introduction for business purposes 31

CHAPTER IV.
SALUTATIONS.
The salutation originally an act of worship--Its form in different
nations--The bow, its proper mode--Words of salutation--Manner of
bowing--Duties of the young to older people--How to avoid
recognition--Etiquette of handshaking--Kissing as a mode of
salutation--The kiss of friendship--The kiss of respect 42
CHAPTER V.
ETIQUETTE ON CALLS.
Morning calls--Evening calls--Rules for formal calls--Calls at Summer
resorts--Reception days--Calls made by cards--Returning the first
call--Calls after a betrothal takes place--Forming new acquaintance by
calls--The first call, by whom to be made--Calls of
Congratulation--Visits of condolence--Keeping an account of
calls--Evening visits--"Engaged" or "not at home" to callers--General
rules relative to calls--New Year's calls 52
CHAPTER