Write Stories To Me, Grandpa! | Page 3

grandchildren in another almost a thousand miles

distant. During one of my visits I took my, then, three-year-old
granddaughter for a stroll. We paused to examine a spider's web
spanning a space between two shrubs. A rain shower had passed shortly
before and droplets festooned the web's strands and rainbow-sparkled
in the morning sunlight. Standing there, both of us bent forward
peering into the web, I wove a story that transformed the sparkling
strands into a carnival and the spider into an acrobat. Granddaughter's
eyes widened with wonder.
We continued on and stopped at a house to observe a cat on the porch
playing with a yellow ball. I wove another tale, this time of a cat and a
strange ball that bounced too high and disappeared into a cloud. Again,
my granddaughter's expression showed her pleasure in hearing
grandpa's story. For the remainder of my visit, and during subsequent
visits, I told her, and when he was old enough, my grandson, of the
world around us and how we hoped to, some day, live all together
peacefully on Planet Earth.
Visits, in either direction were infrequent. Adult-oriented telephone
calls usually left only brief moments for talking to grandchildren. Long
distance calls just didn't generate the right ambiance and enough time
for the relaxed talking and easy listening that goes naturally with a
grandpa story. Then, too, at the close of an adult telephone
conversation the youngsters are usually busy at other things, and
sometimes grandpas just don't do well as talkers.
In my situation, I filled the gap with hand-scribed and, later on, typed
stories. The letter-stories lengthened our telephone chats to devising
plots for new stories, flesh-out characters, settings, and scenes. There
are no better aids to a grandparent-grandchild telephone or email story
conference than our faithful friends Who, What, Where, When, Why
and How.
In my situation, one letter-story followed another, often illustrated with
pictures from discarded magazines. When I couldn't find a just-right
illustration, I laboriously sketched an all-thumbs grandpa original. It
was an enjoyable experience for me, and feedback from the family
showed it was enjoyable for my grandchildren as well.

FAMILY HISTORY SCROLL
The extended family's history scroll is shipped from one relative to
another in a mailing tube or as an attachment to an email. Each family
adds a paragraph or a genealogical sketch to record what happened to
them since the previous go-round and that might be of interest to others.
Generally, the messages and line sketches are hand scribed, but may be
typed and snapshots attached with plastic adhesive tape, or accompany
the email.
When a scroll becomes too cumbersome for easy handling it may be
retired and stored (or electronically archived) with one of the family
members and a note added to a succeeding scroll stating with whom or
where the previous scroll is stored.
WHAT'S IN IT FOR YOU?
Long-term studies of large communities offer evidence that individuals
with strong family and social ties tend to be healthier than those that
live in isolation.
A conference of doctors and social scientists proposed a theory that
altruism, particularly when the helper observes its benefits, can reduce
feelings of helplessness and depression and thus enhance health. Also,
persons who came in direct contact with those that they aided reported
a strong and lasting sense of satisfaction, even exhilaration, an
increased sense of self-worth, less depression, and fewer aches and
pains.
Relating the theory to the theme of these notes, what a grandparent gets
back often depends to the value he or she places on, and the efforts he
or she makes toward building positive intergenerational relationships.
If family has significance, then interacting with a grandchild, near or
faraway, manifests that significance and the returns it generates.
Returns imply investments. As grandparents age, their investment is
transformed into a return.' The 'return' contributes vitality, vibrancy and
enrichment to a grandparent's latter years.

PICTURE POSTCARDS
During a discussion on intergenerational communications one of the
men present said that he wanted to send a picture postcard to his distant
grandchild but didn't know what to write. He said he had been a
salesman but, in this situation, he was at a loss for words.
I asked what he had done earlier that day. He mentioned several
ordinary activities and added, as an afterthought, that he had strolled
along a nearby beach.
'What did you see during your walk?'
'Seals and pelicans on the rocks offshore. Big waves rolling in. One of
the seals slid off the rock and into the water. The tide was out, and I
explored a tide pool. I saw a... .'
He stared at me for a moment, grinned, took his pen from his shirt
pocket and made notes on a slip of paper.
GRANDPARENT'S ROLE
Grandparents generally accept and enjoy the many