What Every Woman Knows | Page 6

parcel, which we now see contains sheets of
foolscap paper. His next action shows that the 'jemmy' is really a ruler.
He knows where the pen and ink are kept. He pulls the fine chair nearer
to the table, sits on it, and proceeds to write, occasionally dotting the
carpet with ink as he stabs the air with his pen. He is so occupied that
he does not see the door opening, and the Wylie family staring at him.
They are armed with sticks.]
ALICK [at last]. When you're ready, John Shand.
[JOHN hints back, and then he has the grace to rise, dogged and
expressionless.]
JAMES [like a railway porter]. Ticket, please.

DAVID. You can't think of anything clever for to go for to say now,
John.
MAGGIE. I hope you find that chair comfortable, young man.
JOHN. I have no complaint to make against the chair.
ALICK [who is really distressed]. A native of the town. The disgrace to
your family! I feel pity for the Shands this night.
JOHN [glowering]. I'll thank you, Mr. Wylie, not to pity my family.
JAMES. Canny, canny.
MAGGIE [that sense of justice again]. I think you should let the young
man explain. It mayn't be so bad as we thought.
DAVID. Explain away, my billie.
JOHN. Only the uneducated would need an explanation. I'm a student,
[with a little passion] and I'm desperate for want of books. You have all
I want here; no use to you but for display; well, I came here to study. I
come twice weekly. [Amazement of his hosts.]
DAVID [who is the first to recover]. By the window.
JOHN. Do you think a Shand would so far lower himself as to enter
your door? Well, is it a case for the police?
JAMES. It is.
MAGGIE [not so much out of the goodness of her heart as to patronise
the Shands]. It seems to me it's a case for us all to go to our beds and
leave the young man to study; but not on that chair. [And she wheels
the chair away from him.]
JOHN. Thank you, Miss Maggie, but I couldn't be beholden to you.
JAMES. My opinion is that he's nobody, so out with him.

JOHN. Yes, out with me. And you'll be cheered to hear I'm likely to be
a nobody for a long time to come.
DAVID [who had been beginning to respect him]. Are you a poor
scholar?
JOHN. On the contrary, I'm a brilliant scholar.
DAVID. It's siller, then?
JOHN [glorified by experiences he has shared with many a gallant
soul]. My first year at college I lived on a barrel of potatoes, and we
had just a sofa-bed between two of us; when the one lay down the other
had to get up. Do you think it was hardship? It was sublime. But this
year I can't afford it. I'll have to stay on here, collecting the tickets of
the illiterate, such as you, when I might be with Romulus and Remus
among the stars.
JAMES [summing up]. Havers.
DAVID [in whose head some design is vaguely taking shape]. Whist,
James. I must say, young lad, I like your spirit. Now tell me, what's
your professors' opinion of your future.
JOHN. They think me a young man of extraordinary promise.
DAVID. You have a name here for high moral character.
JOHN. And justly.
DAVID. Are you serious-minded?
JOHN. I never laughed in my life.
DAVID. Who do you sit under in Glasgow?
JOHN. Mr. Flemister of the Sauchiehall High.
DAVID. Are you a Sabbath-school teacher?

JOHN. I am.
DAVID. One more question. Are you promised?
JOHN. To a lady?
DAVID. Yes.
JOHN. I've never given one of them a single word of encouragement.
I'm too much occupied thinking about my career.
DAVID. So. [He reflects, and finally indicates by a jerk of the head that
he wishes to talk with his father behind the door.]
JAMES [longingly]. Do you want me too?
[But they go out without even answering him.]
MAGGIE. I don't know what maggot they have in their heads, but sit
down, young man, till they come back.
JOHN. My name's Mr. Shand, and till I'm called that I decline to sit
down again in this house.
MAGGIE. Then I'm thinking, young sir, you'll have a weary wait.
[While he waits you can see how pinched his face is. He is little more
than a boy, and he seldom has enough to eat. DAVID and ALICK
return presently, looking as sly as if they had been discussing some
move on the dambrod, as indeed they have.]
DAVID [suddenly become genial]. Sit down, Mr. Shand, and pull in
your chair. You'll have a thimbleful of something to keep the cold out?
[Briskly] Glasses, Maggie.
[She wonders, but gets