The Middle Class Gentleman | Page 7

line. Your wrist
opposite your hip. The point of your sword even with your shoulder.
The arm not so much extended. The left hand at the level of the eye.
The left shoulder more squared. The head up. The expression bold.
Advance. The body steady. Beat carte, and thrust. One, two. Recover.

Again, with the foot firm. Leap back. When you make a pass, Sir, you
must first disengage, and your body must be well turned. One, two.
Come, beat tierce and thrust. Advance. Stop there. One, two. Recover.
Repeat. Leap back. On guard, Sir, on guard. (The fencing master
touches him two or three times with the foil while saying, "On guard." )
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: How was that? (Breathlessly)
MUSIC MASTER: You did marvelously!
FENCING MASTER: As I have told you, the entire secret of fencing
lies in two things: to give and not to receive; and as I demonstrated to
you the other day, it is impossible for you to receive, if you know how
to turn your opponent's sword from the line of your body. This depends
solely on a slight movement of the wrist, either inward or outward.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: In this way then, a man, without courage, is
sure to kill his man and not be killed himself?
FENCING MASTER: Without doubt. Didn't you see the
demonstration?
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Yes.
FENCING MASTER: And thus you have seen how men like me
should be considered by the State, and how the science of fencing is
more important than all the other useless sciences, such as dancing,
music, ...
DANCING MASTER: Careful there, Monsieur swordsman! Speak of
the dance only with respect.
MUSIC MASTER: I beg you to speak better of the excellence of
music.
FENCING MASTER: You are amusing fellows, to want to compare
your sciences with mine!
MUSIC MASTER: See the self-importance of the man!

FENCING MASTER: My little Dancing Master, I'll make you dance as
you ought. And you, my little musician, I'll make you sing in a pretty
way.
DANCING MASTER: Monsieur Clanger-of-iron, I'll teach you your
trade.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: (To the Dancing Master) Are you crazy to
quarrel with him, who knows tierce and quarte, and who can kill a man
by demonstration?
DANCING MASTER: I disdain his demonstrations, and his tierce, and
his quarte.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Careful, I tell you.
FENCING MASTER: What? You little impertinent!
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Oh! My Fencing Master.
DANCING MASTER: What? You big workhorse!
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Oh! My Dancing Master.
FENCING MASTER: If I throw myself on you ...
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Careful.
DANCING MASTER: If I get my hands on you ...
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Be nice!
FENCING MASTER: I'll go over you with a curry-comb, in such a
way...
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Mercy!
DANCING MASTER: I'll give you a beating such as ...

MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: I beg of you!
MUSIC MASTER: Let us teach him a little how to talk!
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Oh Lord! Stop.
SCENE III (Philosophy Master, Music Master, Dancing Master,
Fencing Master, Monsieur Jourdain, Lackeys)
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: Aha! Monsieur Philosopher, you come just
in time with your philosophy. Come, make a little peace among these
people.
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: What's happening? What's the matter,
gentlemen.
MONSIEUR JOURDAIN: They have got into a rage over the
superiority of their professions to the point of injurious words and of
wanting to come to blows.
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: What! Gentlemen, must you act this way?
Haven't you read the learned treatise that Seneca composed on anger?
Is there anything more base and more shameful than this passion,
which turns a man into a savage beast? And shouldn't reason be the
mistress of all our activities?
DANCING MASTER: Well! Sir, he has just abused both of us by,
despising the dance, which I practice, and music, which is his
profession.
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: A wise man is above all the insults that can
be spoken to him; and the grand reply one should make to such
outrages is moderation and patience.
FENCING MASTER: They both had the audacity of trying to compare
their professions with mine.
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: Should that disturb you? Men should not
dispute amongst themselves about vainglory and rank; that which

perfectly distinguishes one from the other is wisdom and virtue.
DANCING MASTER: I insist to him that dance is a science to which
one cannot do enough honor.
MUSIC MASTER: And I, that music is something that all the ages
have revered.
FENCING MASTER: And I insist to them that the science of fencing is
the finest and the most necessary of all sciences.
PHILOSOPHY MASTER: And where then will philosophy be? I find
you all very impertinent to speak with this arrogance in front of me,
and impudently to give the name of science to things that one should
not even honor with the name of art, and that cannot be