The Imaginary Invalid | Page 5

you stop that jade for me?
ANG. Ah! father, don't make yourself ill.
ARG. (to ANGéLIQUE). If you don't stop her, I will refuse you my blessing.
TOI. (_going away_). And I will disinherit her if she obeys you.
ARG. (_throwing himself into his chair_). Ah! I am done for. It is enough to kill me!

SCENE VI.--BéLINE, ARGAN.
ARG. Ah! come near, my wife.
BEL. What ails you, my poor, dear husband?
ARG. Come to my help.
BEL. What is the matter, my little darling child?
ARG. My love.
BEL. My love.
ARG. They have just put me in a rage.
BEL. Alas! my poor little husband! How was that, my own dear pet?
ARG. That jade of yours, Toinette, has grown more insolent than ever.
BEL. Don't excite yourself.
ARG. She has put me in a rage, my dove.
BEL. Gently, my child.
ARG. She has been thwarting me for the last hour about everything I want to do.
BEL. There, there; never mind.
ARG. And has had the impudence to say that I am not ill.
BEL. She is an impertinent hussy.
ARG. You know, my soul, what the truth is?
BEL. Yes, my darling, she is wrong.
ARG. My own dear, that jade will be the death of me.
BEL. Now, don't, don't.
ARG. She is the cause of all my bile.
BEL. Don't be so angry.
ARG. And I have asked you ever so many times to send her away.
BEL. Alas! my child, there is no servant without defects. We are obliged to put up at times with their bad qualities on account of their good ones. The girl is skilful, careful, diligent, and, above all, honest; and you know that in our days we must be very careful what people we take into our house. I say, Toinette.

SCENE VII.--ARGAN, BéLINE, TOINETTE.
TOI. Madam.
BEL. How is this? Why do you put my husband in a passion?
TOI. (_in a soft tone_). I, Madam? Alas! I don't know what you mean, and my only aim is to please master in everything.
ARG. Ah! the deceitful girl!
TOI. He said to us that he wished to marry his daughter to the son of Mr. Diafoirus. I told him that I thought the match very advantageous for her, but that I believed he would do better to put her in a convent.
BEL. There is not much harm in that, and I think that she is right.
ARG. Ah! deary, do you believe her? She is a vile girl, and has said a hundred insolent things to me.
BEL. Well, I believe you, my dear. Come, compose yourself; and you, Toinette, listen to me. If ever you make my husband angry again, I will send you away. Come, give me his fur cloak and some pillows, that I may make him comfortable in his arm-chair. You are all anyhow. Pull your night-cap right down over your ears; there is nothing that gives people such bad colds as letting in the air through the ears.
ARG. Ah, deary! how much obliged I am to you for all the care you take of me.
BEL. (_adjusting the pillows, which she puts round him_). Raise yourself a little for me to put this under you. Let us put this one for you to lean upon, and this one on the other side; this one behind your back, and this other to support your head.
TOI. (_clapping a pillow rudely on his head_). And this other to keep you from the evening damp.
ARG. (_rising angrily, and throwing the pillows after_ TOINETTE, _who runs away_). Ah, wretch! you want to smother me.

SCENE VIII.--ARGAN, BéLINE.
BEL. Now, now; what is it again?
ARG. (_throwing himself in his chair_). Ah! I can hold out no longer.
BEL. But why do you fly into such a passion? she thought she was doing right.
ARG. You don't know, darling, the wickedness of that villainous baggage. She has altogether upset me, and I shall want more than eight different mixtures and twelve injections to remedy the evil.
BEL. Come, come, my dearie, compose yourself a little.
ARG. Lovey, you are my only consolation.
BEL. Poor little pet!
ARG. To repay you for all the love you have for me, my darling, I will, as I told you, make my will.
BEL. Ah, my soul I do not let us speak of that, I beseech you. I cannot bear to think of it, and the very word "will" makes me die of grief.
ARG. I had asked you to speak to our notary about it.
BEL. There he is, close at hand; I have brought him with me.
ARG. Make him come in then, my life!
BEL. Alas! my darling, when a woman loves her husband so much, she finds it almost impossible to think of these things.

SCENE IX.--MR. DE BONNEFOI, BéLINE, ARGAN.
ARG. Come here, Mr. de Bonnefoi, come here. Take a seat, if you please. My wife tells me, Sir, that you are a very honest man, and altogether one of her friends; I have therefore asked her to