The Follies of Love | Page 5

to earth, to make an
eternal war with sleeping men begins his uproar and annoys us all.
Albert And what is this imp and Wandering Jew?
Jenny You.
Albert Me?
Jenny Yes, you. I believe that these rude manners come from some
spirit who is in need of prayers. And to better understand whether this
angry thing was soul or body, that made this Sabbath, one evening, I
took a cord with two ends firmly attached upstairs. It had the effect I
hoped. So soon as all were retired to sleep, I waited in person without
noise or light, on guard in a corner. I wasn't long waiting. So pitty-pat
down the spirit came, noisily tumbling over the cord. He measured the
stairs with his nose. Suddenly, I heard him cry: "Help, I am dead." As
these cries increased--at which I laughed very much--I ran and found
you spread out--with an apostrophe in place of your face. Your nose
gave proof that you were a body and not a spirit.
Albert Ah, miserable scoundrel, adherent of the devil! It was you who
played that abominable trick. You wished to kill me with this cursed
act!
Jenny (innocently) No, it was only to trap the ghost.

Albert I don't know what prevents me from beating you up!
Arabella Sir, easy.
Albert You, too, my pretty, could earn some slaps. Shut up, if you
please. To punish her audacity, I will drive her from my house. How do
you like that?
Jenny (crying) Just heaven, what a sentence. Sir--
Albert (adamant) No, out of the nest, if you please.
Jenny (laughing) Ah, my word, sir, you flatter yourself if you think that
leaving your sad company will make me suffer the least pang. A school
boy leaving his tutor, a woman a long time celibate who leaves her
relatives to get married--a slave who leaves the hands of his masters, an
old prisoner who breaks his chains after thirty years, an heir who sees
his uncle give up the ghost, a husband when the plague takes his
plaguey wife--doesn't have half the pleasure I take in receiving from
you this happy discharge.
Albert Leaving me would please you?
Jenny The greatest pleasure I will have in my life.
Albert Really! If that is so, I've changed my mind. I do not intend to
give you this pleasure. You will stay here to do penance. And you will,
without arguing, go in, and be diligent.
(Arabella reenters and curtsies. As Jenny starts to go, Albert stops her.)
Albert You stay--I wish to speak to you without witnesses. (aside) I'll
have to butter her up--I need her services. (aloud) Come on--let's make
peace and live sensibly. At bottom I love you--and more than you
think.
Jenny And I also love you more than you think.
Albert A pretty amour, truly to break my nose. But, I pardon all, and
promise you that you will enjoy my bounty--if you serve me on
occasion.
Jenny Let's see. What service is in question?
Albert You've known for a long time, that as regards Arabella, I have,
as one ought, a soul a--bit tender. But for the precautions I take for her
the wench would soon take the bit in her teeth. She's always spent her
life in high society with the lady from London--Mrs. Worthy--who took
care of her until she was fifteen. That lady, having died, a relation
begged me to take care of her, and confided her to me. Since then love
has stolen into my heart. I have a plan to make her my wife.

Jenny Your wife! Fie!
Albert What do you mean by that tone?
Jenny Fie, I tell you.
Albert What?
Jenny Hey, fie! Fie--I tell you. You are too intelligent to commit such a
stupidity--and I tell you to your grey beard.
Albert I never had children by my late wife--and I wish to finish what
I've begun--to have heirs whose happy birth will ruin the hopes of all
my collaterals.
Jenny My word, sir, make as many as you please. You won't have any
posterity left behind, and it is I who tell you so.
Albert And why is that?
Jenny How do I know?
Albert Who has given you the privilege of soothsaying? Say, speak,
respond!
Jenny My God--I said nothing except what's reasonable, and you know
it! I understand myself and that's sufficient.
Albert Don't trouble yourself. It's my business--and none of yours!
Jenny Ah, you're right.
Albert Look, you know that around here, one cannot take a step without
falling into some ambush. The snares that surround my soul alarm me. I
have a prize ewe lamb surrounded by care--but the ravishing wolves are
prowling in hopes of carrying her off. I must protect her from their
cruel