The Book of Good Manners | Page 2

is worn at weddings, afternoon teas, receptions, garden
parties, luncheons, church funerals, and at all afternoon functions.

See also EVENING DRESS--MEN. MORNING DRESS--MEN.

AFTERNOON RECEPTIONS. See AFTERNOON TEAS. GIVEN BY
BACHELORS, See BACHELORS' TEAS.

AFTERNOON TEAS (FORMAL). These are very successful as a rule,
due perhaps to their small expense and few exactions, and are given
with many purposes: to introduce young women into society, to allow a
hostess to entertain a number of her friends, to honor some woman of
note, etc.
A formal afternoon tea is one for which cards have been issued, naming
set date.
Awnings and carpet should be provided from curb to house. A man
should be stationed at the curb to open carriage doors and call them
when the guests leave, and another African Teas man should be in
attendance at the front door to open it the moment a guest appears at
the top step and to direct him to the dressing-room.
A policeman should be detailed for the occasion to keep back the
onlookers, and should receive a small fee for his services.
At the door of the drawing-room a man should ask the name of each
guest, which he announces as the latter enters. The hostess and those
receiving with her should be just within the door to receive the guests.
CARDS. Each guest should leave a card in the tray in the hall.
A woman may leave the cards of the men of her family who have been
unable to attend.
Cards should be sent by mail or messenger by those invited but unable
to be present, and should be timed so that they reach the house during
the function.

A husband and wife each send a card when the invitation is issued in
the name of the hostess only, and two cards each when issued in the
name of hostess and her daughter. If issued in the name of both
husband and wife, a husband should send two and his wife should send
one card.
DAUGHTERS. The daughters who have passed the debutante age
usually stand for an hour beside their mother to receive the guests, and
afterward mingle with the guests to help to make the function a
success.
DEBUTANTE. When a tea is given in honor of a debutante, she stands
beside the hostess (usually her mother), and each guest is introduced to
her. Flowers should be liberally provided, and friends may contribute
on such an occasion.
The host and the men all wear the regulation afternoon dress.
Women wear costumes appropriate to the afternoon, more elegant in
proportion to the elaborateness of the function.
Guests may suit their convenience in arriving, provided they do not
come at the opening hour nor at the very end.
After leaving their wraps in the dressing- rooms, guests enter the
drawing-room, leaving their cards in the tray in the hall, and then
giving their names to the man at the door, who announces them.
On entering the room, the women precede the men.
After greeting the hostess and being introduced to those receiving with
her, the guests move into the middle of the room.
Guests go the dining-room when they wish without greeting the
hostess.
It is not expected that guests at a large reception will stay all the
afternoon. Twenty minutes is long enough. It is not necessary to bid the

hostess good-bye when leaving. If guests take leave of host and hostess,
they should shake hands.
In the dining-room the men, assisted by the waiters, help the women.
When the reception is a small formal one, the guests may stay a longer
time, and usually it is better to take leave of the hostess, unless she is
much occupied at the time.
HOST. Except when a newly married couple give a house-warming or
a reception, the host does not stand beside his wife, but spends the time
in making introductions, and doing his best to make the function a
success.
When some married woman or woman guest of honor assists his wife
to receive, he should at the proper moment escort her to the
dining-room.
HOSTESS. The hostess and those receiving with her should be just
within the door, ready to receive each guest as announced.
The hostess shakes hands with each guest, and introduces them to those
receiving with her.
Friends assisting a hostess to entertain are generally permitted to invite
a few of their own friends, and their cards are sent with those of the
hostess. A pretty feature is the presence of a number of young women
here and there in the rooms to assist in receiving the guests. Music is
always appropriate.
HOURS. The hours are from 4 to 7 P.M.
INTRODUCTIONS. The hostess should introduce her guests to those
receiving with her. See also