The Art Of Approaching Women[1] | Page 5

and very much a familiar way of greeting people.
“Yo” is an Intruder that can be used forcefully to enter a personal bubble
as well. “Yo” is also good when approaching a group. However, “Yo” is a
very selfish intruder because it indicates that you may want something
from your target (which you do, but this Intruder may telegraph that).
The final Intruder, “Stop,” is probably the most powerful of the four I have
listed for you. “Stop” is a very forceful intruder, and instantly establishes a
sort of authority for yourself. But it is quite context dependent. In other
words, it is most effective when your target is engaging in some type of
activity, such as walking, jogging, playing a game or sport, leaving a
venue, etc. But you must be forceful with this Intruder, otherwise it won’t
work.
You may notice that I have left out the phrase “Excuse me,” from the list
of common Intruders. This is because “Excuse me” is not an Intruder. The
phrase “Excuse me,” rather than injecting yourself into your target’s
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personal bubble, instead asks permission from your target to be included
in their personal bubble. This gives your target the opportunity to reject
your entrance into their reality, should they so desire. The purpose of
Intruders is to give your target no choice but to let you in, something
which “Excuse me” does not do. Therefore, you should opt NOT to use
this phrase when approaching someone.
Plurals
Intruders work for single targets, but they also work well for groups.
When approaching a group, it is usually best (and more natural) to add a
plural of some sort to the Intruder you are using. The exception to this is
when you use the Intruder “Stop,” because “Stop” can be used for one
person or a thousand people, and it carries the same meaning.
A good plural to use with Intruders is the word “guys.” Approaching a
group with the Intruder “Hi guys,” “Hey guys,” or “Yo guys,” will help
you infiltrate the group bubble they’ve created. The word “there” is also
effective, and can be used for single or group targets. “Hi there,” and “Hey
there,” will get you good effect. Other plurals you can use are “dudes,”
“fellas,” “people,” etc.
Some plurals you will want to avoid when using Intruders is “girls,” or
“ladies” when approaching women you desire. Both of these immediately
point out the sexual difference between them and you, and telegraph your
intent, which could cause the girl’s to raise their defenses. Obviously, you
CAN use both these plurals and succeed, but it’ll make your job harder. A
danger using these types of plurals is that you can also come off sounding
cheesy or sleazy, depending on how you deliver them. It’s best to keep
neutral when intruding upon someone’s personal bubble.
Time Constraints
No matter what you use to Intrude upon someone’s personal bubble, they
will always put up some resistance to admitting you because people, by
nature, are busy. This is why you’ll want to add in “Time Constraints” into
your Intruders. A Time Constraint is a way of telling your target that you
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are going to interact with them for a short period of time. What this does is
bypass that resistance they would put up because you are presenting
yourself as just a momentary distraction to their daily lives. But this gives
you the opportunity to capture their fancy and open them successfully.
Some examples of Time Constraints are:
• Real quick…
• I’ve only got a few seconds…
• I know you’re busy, but…
• I gotta get going in a minute…
• I can only stay a minute…
• This’ll only take a second…

All of these time constraints set the stage for a quick interaction, which
you’ll find most people are open to. But once you’re in your target’s
personal bubble, you’ll find that you can take up as much time as is
necessary to get them interested in you.
Structure of Intruders
The combinations you can create for Intruders are quite numerous, and
they all work. But the basic structures of an Intruder are as follow:
• Single Intruder
• IntruderÖTime Constraint
• IntruderÖPlural
• IntruderÖPluralÖTime Constraint

Here are some examples of Intruders:
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• “Hey guys…”
• “Yo, real quick…”
• “Yo, what’s up?”
• “Hey, I gotta tell you something…”
• “Hi there!”
• “Hello…”
• “Hey, I’ve only got a few seconds…”
• “Yo, I know you’re busy, but…”
• “Stop! This’ll only take a second…”
• “Hi guys, I