A butterfly flaps its wings, the breeze it creates sends a puff of pollen from
a nearby flower into the air, causing a rhinoceros to sneeze. The sound of
that sneeze causes a herd of zebras to stampede, disrupting the flow of
wind current, which helps create a hurricane in the South Pacific, which
causes American Airlines to cancel their flights that night, which means
the girl of your dreams is forced to stay in town for one more day. You
find her at your favorite bar with her friends, partying away her borrowed
time.
Now what?
Though fate may have acted in your favor up to this point by doing the
exact things necessary to get that exact girl to show up in that exact
location at the exact same time that you would be there, the fact remains
that it is now up to you to take action.
But what action do you take? Do you sit at the bar watching her like a
stalker, hoping she’ll notice you and come over to talk? Do you offer to
buy her a drink like every other loser in the bar and go home $8 poorer?
Do you club her over the head and drag her back to your cave? The
answer to all three questions is, of course, NO! Then what’s a guy to do?
This:
You OPEN her.
Not in the literal sense of course. She doesn’t need surgery. The idea of
“opening” is the notion of approaching a woman with the express intent of
engaging her in a conversation. By doing so, you then make her more
receptive to talking to you, effectively opening her up for further
interaction with you – hence the word “opener.”
The “opener” is a line that is used to initiate the conversation. It is often the
first sentence exchanged between the man and the woman he desires.
“Pickup Lines” are forms of openers, but openers can be anything to get
the girl talking.
4
The Art of Approaching
Why is this important? Simple. If you DON’T open a woman, your
chance of seeing her again and leading into a relationship or sex is
approximately zero! After all, you can’t further an interaction that’s never
been initiated. But when you DO open a woman, your odds of segueing
that into some type of relationship increase dramatically. From the opener,
you have many different threads you can follow, from friendship, to
girlfriend, to one night stand, your options are only limited by your own
beliefs and social skills.
But you’re not going to get anywhere until you start that conversation, and
start it off RIGHT. Believe it or not, there is a wrong way to approach
someone, which we’ll cover later on in the book.
So now that you understand what an Opener is, and why it’s important,
let’s move on to another important concept – that of “Interest.”
5
The Art of Approaching
What is Interest?
There is more to Opening a woman than simply knowing what to say.
Indeed, the process of Opening a girl can be quite involved. I don’t want to
bog you down with too much theory here, because honestly, every rule or
guideline I lay out in this book can be broken if the context is right, but I
think this is an important concept for everyone to grasp.
Interest can be defined as any “involvement with or participation in
something.” A dictionary-like example of this would be: She has an
interest in the quality of her education. So in this respect, we’re treating the
word “Interest” as a verb, or action that one does.
This is important to know, because most people can be very transparent
with their interests, especially when it comes to dealing with other people.
Have you ever heard anyone talk about someone they’ve just fallen in love
with? As they’re telling you about that person, their eyes grow wide, their
speech gets faster, they get more energetic as they recall traits about that
person they like, etc., etc.? Well, that’s a perfect example of how someone
shows Interest in another person.
As human beings, we have an innate instinct for when people are
interested in us. This is because we can recognize certain traits and
behaviors that signal the person we are interacting with has a certain kind
of interest in who we are, what we do, etc. When someone is sexually
attracted to us, there are certain signals we pick up on which telegraph this
Interest.
Women have seen these signals numerous times from countless men, and
they are very sharp when it comes to picking up on these signals of
Interest. I call the displaying of these
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