Sex Positions | Page 7

for
direct
stimulation, so
you could begin
by rubbing the
whole vulva,
then gradually
move inside
with delicate
fingers. Allow
yourself to fantasize to increase arousal. Be patient,
but if the pleasure wears off without you having had
an orgasm then you should stop. Don't be
disappointed with yourself, as it may take several
sessions before you can relax enough to really let go.
When you feel a gathering tension in
the vaginal area and a build-up of warmth, orgasm is
on the way. Continue to stimulate yourself, as if you
stop, these sensations will fade and it may be difficult
to get them back again. The clitoris becomes
increasingly sensitive as you proceed, whether you
are stimulating it directly or not, and then orgasm
breaks out with waves of vaginal contractions. Most
women like some form of genital contact during
orgasm: either continued stimulation or pressing or
holding the vaginal area. Some like to insert a finger
into the vagina as they come.
 Most men are
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expert at giving
themselves pleasure, but
there's no harm in extra
practice. A good way of
finding out exactly how your
genitals respond to
stimulation is by soaping and
gentle massage in the bath,
allowing yourself to fantasize
as you do so. Some men
enjoy fondling their testicles,
and some enjoy penetrating the anus with a finger.
There are many different strokes you can use on the
penis. If you are uncircumcised, you can draw the
foreskin over the head of the penis and then pull it
back down the shaft to get an erection; if you are
circumcised, repeated squeezing round the shaft and
letting go is usually effective. Then you can let your
hand glide up and down the shaft in long slow
movements, gradually building up speed and
pressure. You may enjoy rubbing or tickling the glans
of the penis, though for some men this is too
sensitive. You may like gentle or firm pulling, stroking,
squeezing and stretching. Try holding off ejaculation
by varying the stroke when you become too excited,
before finally letting go in orgasm.
Masturbation need not be something
that you do only when you are alone. Many people
find the sight of their partner masturbating highly
erotic. It can also be very instructive to discover how
your partner reaches orgasm alone, as this will be the
best method for you to adopt when you are
masturbating him or her. Masturbating with your
partner will break down inhibitions and allow you to
get even closer.
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Masturbating your partner
in the way he or she enjoys is an important part of
lovemaking, and many women like being masturbated
to orgasm before penetration. Both men and women
need to learn how to handle each other's genitals with
tenderness and sensitivity.
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Side by side
This position, with the lovers lying side by side
and facing one another, is easy to slip into after
mutual masturbation, and can be a prelude to
rolling over with either partner on top. Here, the
woman has her leg wrapped round her partner's
body to facilitate deeper penetration: she pulls
him towards her with her leg as he thrusts. The
partners can kiss and touch each other's genitals
while making love in this position.
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Split level
This is one of a number of 'split-level' positions
that gives the partners a different view of each
other and a different angle of penetration. Here,
the woman lies on her back, her legs round her
partner's waist, while he kneels. He is in total
control, and can also stimulate her clitoris with his
fingers. From this position he can let her legs
drop and lie on top of her in the missionary
position, or he can raise her legs, resting them
around his shoulders, then bend forward to kiss
her mouth at the same time gaining depth of
penetration.
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Spoons
The 'spoons' position is so named because of the
close fit of the two bodies. The partners lie on
their sides and the man enters from behind. This
position is cozy and relaxing, good for slow
drowsy lovemaking prior to failing asleep, or on
waking during the night. It is also a comfortable
position