Rogers-isms | Page 2

till it comes to me,"
Our Show was playing in Philadelphia when the first Armistace was
signed, (The one the saloon men framed up) I was a bit leary of it all
the time as I had been there once before when the Union League Club
had paraded for a Mr Hughes, Then later they had to put the Parade
back,

I HAD ALWAYS BELIEVED PHILA TO BE SLOW AND HERE IT
WAS 2 DAYS AHEAD OF THE FACTS
At that time everybody wondered what to do with the Kaiser, I thought
he should have been brought to this Country and made to clean the
streets after that first Armistace day,
A funny thing the Armistace was signed about the time the returns of
the last election come in. The Germans and the Democrats learned their
fate on the same day,
When the war was over the Kaiser called his 6 sons to him and said,
"Now boys we better duck Cause this war is over and you boys can get
hurt Now,"
The thing that hurt the Kaiser worse than losing the war, Was that in all
the Armistace terms they dident even mention his name,
Everybody commence talking about the Peace Conference and who
was to go, Some Republican Senators went so far as to engage a lower
birth,
There was so much argument about who was to go, That Pres Wilson
says I tell you what, "We will split 50-50 I will go and you fellows can
stay,"
At last we were going to get even with them for all their commissions
coming over here,
You know for a while COMMISSIONS were coming so fast, That we
were lucky to find a fellow who knew what Flag to put out each day,
We were meeting Servian Commissions with Romanian Flags,
Of course there were nations coming at that time who had not enough
to support a flag, Thats why the commission were here to place a Flag
Contract,
Now to get to my Peace trip, About three months are supposed to have

elapsed between the last Paragraph and this one, All of which time was
taken up by Congress talking, (see congressional Record) Finally Pres
Wilson got tired listening to them and walked out on them,
If it had not been to get away from Congress, I have my doubts if he
would have gone to Europe,
Now for the Number 2 Peace trip,
This Peace trip is not an original Idea, (It was originated by some
obscure MANAFACTURER OF KNICK NACKS,) Name furnished at
advertising rates,
Its always the same, the fellow who originates anything or starts
something new is generally called a nut, The next fellow comes along
takes his Idea improves on it and of course is a smart man,
Of Course this No 2 Company used better Judgement than the first one.
This one waited till the war was over to Go,
This is the only case in Theatrical History where the No 2 Company
was better than the original,
Of corse I claim this Manafacturer in some middle west town (I cant
seem to recall that fellows name) made one mistake, There were people
on his Boat that should never have had a return trip ticket,
Through Holland receiving them is where the Kaiser got his idea of
going there,
Of course there was a lot of dissatisfaction against the Pres going,
Mostly by people whom he did not take along,
I was in favor of his going because I thought it would give us a chance
to find out who was Vice President, But it Dident,
I also felt confident that he was the only man that could explain the 14
points

We were especially lucky in having him represent us in England as he
is the only one we could have sent that spoke good enough english that
they could understand,
He would have taken a Senator but couldent find one that had a dress
Suit
A congressman of course was out of the question He couldent have
eaten off a 15 million dollar plate He would have starved to death
looking at it,
For awhile it looked like Mr Hughes would get to go, While the others
were signing up he could have been investigating, his report would
have been ready the day before the next election,
Also asked a manafacturer from some lake town (I cant think of that
Birds name) But he said "No thank you one trip cured me"
The Sectry of Agriculture was named to go for a while, It was thought
that if we were fortunate enough to be assigned any loose Islands at the
meeting He could immediately advise what to plant thereby getting in a
crop next year,
MR ROOT was named then some one