My Lady of the Chinese Courtyard | Page 3

papers quickly in thy hand,
because it is the written word of Kwei-li, who sends with each stroke of
brush a part of her heart.
2
My Dear One, My first letter to thee was full of sadness and longing
because thou wert newly gone from me. Now a week has passed, the
sadness is still in my heart, but it is buried deep for only me to know. I
have my duties which must be done, my daily tasks that only I can do
since thine Honourable Mother has handed me the keys of the rice-bin.
I realise the great honour she does me, and that at last she trusts me and
believes me no child as she did when I first entered her household.
Can I ever forget that day when I came to my husband's people? I had
the one great consolation of a bride, my parents had not sent me away
empty-handed. The procession was almost a li in length and I watched
with a swelling heart the many tens of coolies carrying my household
goods. There were the silken coverlets for the beds, and they were

folded to show their richness and carried on red lacquered tables of
great value. There were the household utensils of many kinds, the
vegetable dishes, the baskets, the camphor-wood baskets containing my
clothing, tens upon tens of them; and I said within my heart as they
passed me by, "Enter my new home before me. Help me find a loving
welcome." Then at the end of the chanting procession I came in my red
chair of marriage, so closely covered I could barely breathe. My
trembling feet could scarce support me as they helped me from the
chair, and my hand shook with fear as I was being led into my new
household. She stood bravely before you, that little girl dressed in red
and gold, her hair twined with pearls and jade, her arms tiny finger, but
with all her bravery she was frightened-- frightened. She was away
from her parents for the first time, away from all who love her, and she
knew if she did not meet with approval in her new home her rice-bowl
would be full of bitterness for many moons to come.
After the obeisance to the ancestral tablet and we had fallen upon our
knees before thine Honourable Parent, I then saw for the first time the
face of my husband. Dost thou remember when first thou raised my
veil and looked long into my eyes? I was thinking, "Will he find me
beautiful?" and in fear I could look but for a moment, then my eyes fell
and I would not raise then to thine again. But in that moment I saw that
thou wert tall and beautiful, that thine eyes were truly almond, that thy
skin was clear and thy teeth like pearls. I was secretly glad within my
heart, because I have known of brides who, when they saw their
husbands for the first time, wished to scream in terror, as they were old
or ugly. I thought to myself that I could be happy with this tall, strong
young man if I found favour in his sight, and I said a little prayer to
Kwan-yin. Because she has answered that prayer, each day I place a
candle at her feet to show my gratitude.
I think thine Honourable Mother has passed me the keys of the
household to take my mind from my loss. She says a heart that is busy
cannot mourn, and my days are full of duties. I arise in the morning
early, and after seeing that my hair is tidy, I take a cup of tea to the
Aged One and make my obeisance; then I place the rice and water in
their dishes before the God of the Kitchen, and light a tiny stick of

incense for his altar, so that our day may begin auspiciously. After the
morning meal I consult with the cook and steward. The vegetables must
be regarded carefully and the fish inspected, and I must ask the price
that has been paid, because often a hireling is hurried and forgets that a
bargain is not made with a breath.
I carry the great keys and feel much pride when I open the door of the
storeroom. Why, I do not know, unless it is because of the realisation
that I am the head of this large household. If the servants or their
children are ill, they come to me instead of to thine Honourable Mother,
as they be too rare or heavy for one of my mind and experience.
Then I go with the gardener to the terrace and help him arrange the
flowers for the day. I love the