Mr. Scraggs | Page 4

the young woman that here was a decent honest
man--hurrying over the rest of the description--just evaporating for love
of her, that she might be persuaded to come out and marry him. We
weren't going to let our pardner slip away without an effort anyhow.
We couldn't do no less than try. Then come the problem of who was the
proper party to act as messenger. The rest of us, without bothering him
by taking him into our confidence, decided that Scraggs was the proper
man, because, if he didn't know Women and her Ways, the subject
belonged to the lost arts.
"But, man! Didn't he r'ar when we told him!
"'ME go after a woman!' says he. '_ME_!!!--Take another drink!' But
we labored with him. Told about what a horrible time he'd had--he
always liked to hear about it--and how there wasn't anybody else fit to
handle his discard in the little game of matrimony--and what was the
use of sending a man that would break at the first wire fence? If we was
going to do the thing, we wanted to do it; and so forth and so forth, till
we had him saddled and bridled and standing in the corner of the corral
as peaceful as a soldier's monument, for he was the best-hearted old

cuss under his crust that ever lived.
"'All right,' says he. 'I'll do it, and it's "Get there, Eli!" when I hook dirt.
Poor old Aleck is as good as married, and the Lord have mercy on his
soul! But there's one thing I wish to state: I'm running the job, and I run
it my own way. I don't want any interfering nor no talk afterward--'s
that understood?
"It was. He was to cut loose.
"'All right,' says he. 'Poor Aleck!' So that night E. G. W. Scraggs took
his cayuse and made for the railroad station, bound east.
"Aleck had give us full details. We knew all about his little town and
about that house in particular; just how the morning-glories grew over
the back porch, looking out on the garden patch, and where the cistern
was, which, with his usual good luck, Aleck had managed to fall into,
whilst they were putting a new cover on it. Yessir; we knew that little
East Dakota town as well as if we'd been raised there; but we were
some shy on details concerning the girl. I swear I don't believe Aleck
had ever looked her full in the face. She was medium height, plump,
blue eyes, brown hair, and that ended the description,
"We suffered any quantity from impatience before E. G. W. showed up.
You see, there ain't such a lot that happens to other people occurrin' on
a ranch, and we was really more excited over Aleck and his girl than a
tenderfoot would be over a gun fight, and for the same reason; it was
out of our ordinary.
"Scraggsy didn't keep us on the anxious seat. He was the surest thing I
ever saw. Often I've watched him rope a critter; he never whirled his
rope, even when riding--always snapped. And he never made a quick
move--that is, a move that looked in a hurry--all the same, every time
he let go of the rope, there was his meat on the other end of it. Women
was the only thing that did E. G. W. Scraggs, and that's because he
wholesaled the business. That ambition of his wrecked him. When he
trotted around the track for fun, nobody else in the heat could see him
for the dust.
"One evening about half-past eight, when the glow was still strong,
here come Scraggs, prompt to the schedule. He was riding and a buggy
trailed behind him.
"We chased Aleck over to the main house, where the old man, who
stood in on the play, was to keep him busy until called for.

"Then up pulls E. G. W. and the buggy. In the buggy was a young
woman, and a man.
"'Here we are,' says Scraggs, in the tone of one who has done his
painful duty. 'Check the outfit--one girl and one splicer--have you kept
holt of Aleck?'
"'Yes,' I says. 'We've got him--come in, folks.' I was crazy to hear how
he'd pulled it off. Soon's they got inside I lugged him to the corner,
leaving the other boys to welcome the guests. 'Tell me about it,' I says.
"'Short story,' says he. 'Moment I got off the choo-choo I spotted the
house--couldn't mistake it. Laid low in the daytime and scouted around
as soon as night come. Girl goes down to the barn and comes back with
a pail of milk. I grabbed her and put my hand over her mouth so's she
couldn't holler. "Now listen,"