Mr. Midshipman Easy | Page 7

power over him, I have no doubt; but what will be the consequence?
The boy will consider his mother as a protector, and you as a tyrant. He
will have an aversion to you, and with that aversion he will never pay
respect and attention to your valuable precepts when he arrives at an
age to understand them. Now it appears to me that this difficulty which
you have raised may be got over. I know a very worthy clergyman who
does not use the birch; but I will write, and put the direct question to
him; and then if your boy is removed from the danger arising from Mrs
Easy's overindulgence, in a short time he will be ready for your more
important tuition."

"I think," replied Mr Easy, after a pause, "that what you say merits
consideration. I acknowledge that in consequence of Mrs Easy's
nonsensical indulgence, the boy is unruly, and will not obey me at
present; and if your friend does not apply the rod, I will think seriously
of sending my son John to him to learn the elements."
The Doctor had gained his point by flattering the philosopher. In a day
he returned with a letter from the pedagogue in answer to one supposed
to be sent to him, in which the use of the birch was indignantly
disclaimed, and Mr Easy announced to his wife, when they met that
day at tea-time, his intentions with regard to his son John.
To school, Mr Easy? what, send Johnny to school! a mere infantto
school!"
"Surely, my dear, you must be aware that at nine years it is high time
that he learnt to read."
"Why he almost reads already, Mr Easy; surely I can teach him that.
Does he not, Sarah?"
"Lord bless him, yes, ma'am, he was saying his letters yesterday."
"Oh, Mr Easy, what can have put this in your head? Johnny, dear, come
here-tell me now what's the letter A? You were singing it in the garden
this morning."
"I want some sugar," replied Johnny, stretching his arm over the table
to the sugar-basin, which was out of his reach.
"Well, my love, you shall have a great lump if you will tell me what's
the letter A." "A was an archer, and shot at a frog," replied Johnny in a
surly tone.
"There now, Mr Easy; and he can go through the whole alphabet-can't
he, Sarah?"
"That he can, the dear-can't you, Johnny dear?"

"No," replied Johnny.
"Yes, you can, my love; you know what's the letter B. Now don't you?"
"Yes," replied Johnny.
"There, Mr Easy, you see what the boy knows, and how obedient he is
too. Come, Johnny dear, tell us what was B?"
"No, I won't," replied Johnny, "I want some more sugar"; and Johnny,
who had climbed on a chair, spread himself over the table to reach it.
"Mercy! Sarah, pull him off-he'll upset the urn," screamed Mrs Easy.
Sarah caught hold of Johnny by the loins to pull him back, but Johnny,
resisting the interference, turned round on his back as he lay on the
table, and kicked Sarah in the face, just as she made another desperate
grasp at him. The rebound from the kick, given as he lay on a smooth
mahogany table, brought Johnny's head in contact with the urn, which
was upset in the opposite direction, and, notwithstanding a rapid
movement on the part of Mr Easy, he received a sufficient portion of
boiling liquid on his legs to scald him severely, and induce him to
stamp and swear in a very unphilosophical way. In the meantime Sarah
and Mrs Easy had caught up Johnny, and were both holding him at the
same time, exclaiming and lamenting. The pain of the scald, and the
indifference shown towards him, were too much for Mr Easy's temper
to put up with. He snatched Johnny out of their arms, and, quite
forgetting his equality and rights of man, belaboured him without
mercy. Sarah flew into interfere, and received a blow which not only
made her see a thousand stars, but sent her reeling on the floor. Mrs
Easy went off into hysterics, and Johnny howled so as to be heard at a
quarter of a mile.
How long Mr Easy would have continued it is impossible to say; but
the door opened, and Mr Easy looked up while still administering the
punishment, and perceived Dr Middleton in mute astonishment. He had
promised to come in to tea, and enforce Mr Easy's arguments, if it were
necessary; but it certainly appeared to him, that in the argument which
Mr Easy was then enforcing, he required no assistance. However, at the

entrance of Dr Middleton, Johnny was dropped, and lay roaring on the
floor; Sarah, too, remained where