Lucky Pehr | Page 9

Grace would like to give your vote to our
candidate--
PEHR. Without having to read--is that permissible? Thank you, my
good friend! Pen and ink!
PETITIONER. [Hands Pehr pen, ink and paper for signature.]
Admirable! I thank Your Grace.
PEHR. [Embracing him.] Ah, it is I that must thank you!
BUTLER. [Raps on table three times with staff; servants enter with
dishes.] Dinner is served. [All go except Pehr and butler.]

PEHR. [Sits down at table.] At last! [Soft music.] See, now they go
when he commands; but when I beg, it's useless!
BUTLER. It is not my command they obey, Your Grace, but the rules
of etiquette.
PEHR. And they transcend my will?
BUTLER. Laws are the agreements of many, and must of course come
before the individual's will.
PEHR. I declare, he can answer all things! Now I shall enjoy myself at
all events. Wine warms the heart, food warms the body--but where's the
pleasure in loneliness? Mr. Butler, do the rules of etiquette permit that
one has company when one is enjoying oneself?
BUTLER. I almost believe that something in that way is required.
PEHR. Well, then, I want--
[First Friend enters and rushes into Pehr's arms.]
FIRST FRIEND. Friend of my heart! So I see thee again after such a
long separation! And you are like yourself--a little thinner than when I
last saw you; but how's everything now, dear old chap?
PEHR. [Eyeing him.] Oh, thanks, thanks--very well indeed, as--ahem--
you see. Pray take a chair and sit down.
FIRST FRIEND. Why, bless my soul! I've just had dinner, but I'll go
into your ante-room and wait there while you finish yours.
PEHR. No, that is just what you shall not do! I remarked a while ago
that I thought life so empty when one must sit alone at table. Take a
chair and sit down.
FIRST FRIEND. Dear old friend, if you insist I will sit beside you
while you dine; but it actually looks as though I had come here for a
meal.

PEHR. What matter even if it were so.
FIRST FRIEND. [Protests.] Oh--!
PEHR. Wait a bit--I'm not saying that it is so!
FIRST FRIEND. [Seats himself.] So now you are in clover, as they say.
It is pleasant to contemplate that fate can be so kindly, and it must ever
rejoice a sensitive soul to see that some one is favored by fickle fortune.
Not all--more's the pity!--can praise fickle fortune.
PEHR. Indeed! Have you any grievances?
FIRST FRIEND. I?
PEHR. Yes--for I don't want to hear any hard-luck stories now, when
I'm eating. Won't you be good enough to favor me by trying a
hazel-grouse?
FIRST FRIEND. If you speak of favors, my friend!
PEHR. Then you mustn't say "my friend"; you must call me by name.
FIRST FRIEND. Christopher! You ask a service of poor me--can I then
deny you! [He begins to eat, his appetite increases during following
repartee. Pehr regards him with open-eyed wonder.]
PEHR. One should never deny another anything?
FIRST FRIEND. Well said! One should never deny oneself anything--
one another, I mean.
[Enter Second Friend.]
SECOND FRIEND. [Walking straight up to the table.] Good day,
Goran! Do you remember me? [Pehr Stares at him.] No you don't, but I
remember you. You see, I never forget my old friends! In the hour of
need I look them up. Here you sit and eat and I have nothing to eat,
therefore I say right out: Boy, here am I! [Seats himself at table.]

FIRST FRIEND. [To Pehr.] Who is that tramp? He eats as though he
had not seen food from Christmas to Easter!
PEHR. Oh, he's a friend of mine.
SECOND FRIEND. [To Pehr.] Who is that beggar? He stuffs himself
like a. wolf in the springtime!
PEHR. Oh, he is a good friend of mine.
FIRST FRIEND. [To Pehr.] Beware false friends, Pehr!
SECOND FRIEND. [To Pehr.] Beware false friends, Pehr!
PEHR. Yes, yes!
FIRST FRIEND. [To Pehr.] You'll see, he is going to borrow money
from you.
SECOND FRIEND. [To Pehr.] If he asks for a loan from you, you must
say no--for he never pays.
PEHR. You don't say so! Well, good friends, don't you think this an
excellent repast?
SECOND FRIEND. I never flatter!
FIRST FRIEND. No, my friend, you only stuff yourself! I never flatter,
either, but I cannot therefore mask the truth and must acknowledge that
anything of this sort I have never before had a share in, and it has to be
Christopher that offers such a treat! Your health, brother Christopher!
PEHR. [Aghast.] Christopher?
SECOND FRIEND. I'm a plain, everyday sort of man, and cannot
make pretty speeches--which I scorn, and the expression of which from
such a source I can ascribe only to a secret desire to