Hocken and Hunken | Page 3

sort," snapped Mr Rogers. Seeing how Captain
Cai's face fell, he added, "I may be wrong, o' course, but I reckon there
was two tenants, and they wanted a cottage apiece."
"Ah, to be sure!" agreed the honest captain, visibly relieved.
But the Quaymaster persisted. "Yes, yes; there was talk of a friend o'
yours, an' that you two were for settin' up house alongside one another.
Hunken was the name, if I remember?"
Again Captain Cai glanced at the ship-chandler. He was plainly puzzled,
as the ship-chandler was plainly nettled. But he answered simply--
"That's it--'Bias Hunken."
"Have I met the man, by any chance?"
"No," said Captain Cai firmly, "you haven't, or you wouldn't ask the
question. He's the best man ever wore shoe-leather, and you can trust
him to the end o' the earth."
"I can't say as I know a Hunken answerin' that description," Mr Bussa
confessed dubiously.
"You've heard the description, anyway," suggested Mr Rogers, losing
patience. "And now, Peter Bussa, what d'ye say to running off and
annoying somebody else?"
The Quaymaster fawned, and was backing away. But at this point up
came Barber Toy, who for some minutes had been fretting to attract
Captain Cai's notice, and could wait no longer.
"Hulloa, there! Is it Cap'n Cai?--an' still carryin' his gaff-tops'l, I see"

(this in pleasant allusion to the tall hat). "Well, home you be, it seems,
an' welcome as flowers in May!"
"Thank 'ee, Toy." Captain Cai shook hands.
"We was talkin' business," said the ship-chandler pointedly.
"Then you might ha' waited for a better occasion," Mr Toy retorted.
"Twasn' mannerly of ye, to say the least."
"Better be unmannerly than troublesome, I've heard."
"Better be both than unfeelin'. What! Leave Cap'n Cai, here, pass my
door, an' never a home-comin' word?"
"I was meanin' to pay you a visit straight away; indeed I was," said
Captain Cai contritely. "Troy streets be narrow and full o' friends; and
when a man's accustomed to sea-room--" He broke off and drew a long
breath. "But O, friends, if you knew the good it is!"
"Ay, Cap'n: East or West, home is best."
"And too far East is West, as every sailor man knows. . . . There, now,
take me along and think' that out while you're giving me a clip; for the
longer you stand scratching your head the longer my hair's growing."
He turned to Mr Rogers. "So long, soce! I'll be punctual at
twelve-thirty--what's left of me."
CHAPTER II.
THE BARBER'S CHAIR.
"This is home!" Captain Cai settled himself down in the barber's chair
with a sigh of luxurious content. "I've heard married men call it better,"
said Mr Toy, fetching forth a clean wrapper.
"Very likely." The Captain sighed again contentedly. "I take no truck in
marriage, for my part. A friend's company enough for me."

"What's his name, Cap'n? The whole town's dyin' to know."
"He's called Hunken--Tobias Hunken."
The barber paused, snapping his scissors and nodding. "Bussa was right
then, or Bussa and Philp between 'em."
"Hey?"
"'Tis wonderful how news gets abroad in Troy. . . . 'Hunken,' now? And
where might he be one of? I don't seem to fit the name in my mem'ry at
all."
"You wouldn't. He comes from t'other side of the Duchy--a
Padstow-born man, and he've never set eyes on Troy in his life."
"Yet he takes a house an' settles here? That's queer, as you might say."
"I see nothing queer about it. He's my friend--that's why. And what's
more, the Lord never put bowels into a better man."
"He'll be a pleasure to shave, then," opined Mr Toy.
"No, he won't; he wears his hair all over his face. Talkin' of that
reminds me--when you've done croppin' me I want a clean shave."
"Chin-beard an' all, Cap'n?"
"Take it off--take it off! 'Twas recommended to me against sore throat;
but I never liked the thing nor the look of it."
"Then there's one point, it seems, on which you an' your friend don't
agree, sir?"
The barber meant this facetiously, but Captain Cai considered it in all
seriousness.
"You're mistaken," he answered. "Between friends there's a
give-an'-take, and until you understand that you don't understand

friendship. 'Bias Hunken likes me to do as I choose, and I like 'Bias to
do as he chooses: by consekence o' which the more we goes our own
ways the more we goes one another's. That clear, I hope."
"Moderately," the barber assented.
"I'll put it t'other way--about an' make it still clearer. Most married
folks, as I notice, start t'other way about. For argyment's sake we'll call
'em Jack an' Joan. Jack starts by thinkin' Joan pretty near perfection; but
he wants her quite perfect and all to his mind--his mind, d'ye see? Now
if