Fables For The Times | Page 2

on the sea-shore, thought to show off a little and make the oyster envious.
After he had done some surprising leaps and curvetings, he went up to the oyster, and, with a toss of his head, said:
"There! what do you think of that?"
"You must excuse me," answered the bivalve, "but I have been blind from birth, and missed the whole show."
IMMORAL:
Of what use is a dress suit in the Desert of Sahara?
[Illustration: The Horse and the Oyster.]

The Monkey and the Ass.
An ass, having seen a monkey doing tricks on a roof, to the edification of the villagers, became envious, and essayed to emulate his more agile rival.
The roof broke under his greater weight, and he fell through on his master, squashing him flatter than a pan-cake. Thenceforward, having no one to say him nay, he lived a life of peace and plenty, coming and going at his own sweet will, while the monkey was captured by an organ grinder and works eighteen hours a day.
IMMORAL:
People are not always such asses as they seem to us.
[Illustration: The Monkey and the Ass.]

The Merchant and the Fool.
A merchant of horses was driving his stock to the market. On the road he met a venerable old fool, who offered to buy his entire stock.
"It is this way," said the intended purchaser, "I will take your horses now, and whenever I find use for one, I will send you the money for it."
"Now the gods be lenient to folly!" exclaimed the indignant merchant. "Man, Man! where in the realm of idiocy did you get your knowledge of business?"
"I ran a pay-on-publication journal for ten years," said the fool with asperity.
But the merchant had vanished in a cloud of oaths and dust.
[Illustration: The Merchant and the Fool.]

The Wolf and the Sheep.
A wolf that had been left for dead by the dogs lay not far from a running brook. He felt that one good drink might save his life. Just then a sheep passed near.
"Pray, sister," said he very gently, but with a sinister twinkle of his eye teeth, "bring me some water from yon stream."
"Certainly," said the sheep, and she brought him a glass in which she had poured a few knock-out drops. As she sat on his corpse a little later she moralized in this manner: "Some clever people are wicked, but all wicked people are not clever by a d----d sight."
[Illustration: The Wolf and the Sheep.]

The Ambitious Hippopotamus.
A hippopotamus who had dwelt contentedly for years on the banks of a reedy stream, looked up one day and saw an eagle.
She became immediately fired with a desire to fly. Having lived a staid and respectable life that could not but find favor in the eyes of the gods, she raised her voice in prayer.
Jove smiled a little, but granted her request.
On the instant a pair of broad, powerful wings were affixed to her shoulders.
She was naturally a trifle nervous about trying them at first, but finally mustered up her courage.
Away she swooped, and with a pardonable vanity took her course over a piece of jungle where some old friends lived.
Precisely thirty-eight seconds later a convention of animals, all swearing and trembling with fright, were trying to conceal themselves in the same three-by-four hole in the ground.
The effect on the other animals disconcerted the good-natured hippopotamus to such an extent that she lost control of herself and sailed through the forest like an avalanche on a bender. Down went the trees and crack went the branches, while horror-stricken beasts with bristling hair split the welkin with their shrieks.
The hippopotamus made for home at her best speed. Arriving over the familiar spot, she let go all holds and came down ker-splash in the mud, knocking the astonished little hippopotamuses out into mid-stream.
"Oh, Jupiter! take 'em off!" she gasped. "I now see that the hippopotamus was not intended to fly."
IMMORAL:
It takes more than nine bloomers to make a man.
[Illustration: The Ambitious Hippopotamus.]

The Man and the Serpent.
A man, who had lived a beautiful purple life, went to sleep under a tree in the forest. Jove sent a huge serpent to destroy him. The man awakened as the reptile drew near.
"What a horrid sight!" he said. "But let us be thankful that the pink-and-green elephant and the feathered hippopotamus are not also in evidence."
And he took a dose of bromide and commended himself again to sleep, while the serpent withdrew in some confusion.
WHAT THIS PROVES TO A THINKING MIND:
Jove himself couldn't get a job as Sunday-School Superintendent on his reputation.
[Illustration: The Man and the Serpent.]

The Appreciative Man.
A man stood in the archway of an ancient temple. He took in the wonderful proportions and drank of the exquisite detail in an ecstasy of delight.
"Oh, great is art!" he cried in a frenzy. "Art is all! the only God!"
Just then an earthquake came