we are to delusion in what relates to ourselves, and also how
much the judgments of our friends are to be suspected when given in
our favor. But I shall endeavor in this discourse to describe the paths I
have followed, and to delineate my life as in a picture, in order that
each one may also be able to judge of them for himself, and that in the
general opinion entertained of them, as gathered from current report, I
myself may have a new help towards instruction to be added to those I
have been in the habit of employing.
My present design, then, is not to teach the method which each ought to
follow for the right conduct of his reason, but solely to describe the
way in which I have endeavored to conduct my own. They who set
themselves to give precepts must of course regard themselves as
possessed of greater skill than those to whom they prescribe; and if
they err in the slightest particular, they subject themselves to censure.
But as this tract is put forth merely as a history, or, if you will, as a tale,
in which, amid some examples worthy of imitation, there will be found,
perhaps, as many more which it were advisable not to follow, I hope it
will prove useful to some without being hurtful to any, and that my
openness will find some favor with all.
From my childhood, I have been familiar with letters; and as I was
given to believe that by their help a clear and certain knowledge of all
that is useful in life might be acquired, I was ardently desirous of
instruction. But as soon as I had finished the entire course of study, at
the close of which it is customary to be admitted into the order of the
learned, I completely changed my opinion. For I found myself involved
in so many doubts and errors, that I was convinced I had advanced no
farther in all my attempts at learning, than the discovery at every turn
of my own ignorance. And yet I was studying in one of the most
celebrated schools in Europe, in which I thought there must be learned
men, if such were anywhere to be found. I had been taught all that
others learned there; and not contented with the sciences actually taught
us, I had, in addition, read all the books that had fallen into my hands,
treating of such branches as are esteemed the most curious and rare. I
knew the judgment which others had formed of me; and I did not find
that I was considered inferior to my fellows, although there were
among them some who were already marked out to fill the places of our
instructors. And, in fine, our age appeared to me as flourishing, and as
fertile in powerful minds as any preceding one. I was thus led to take
the liberty of judging of all other men by myself, and of concluding that
there was no science in existence that was of such a nature as I had
previously been given to believe.
I still continued, however, to hold in esteem the studies of the schools. I
was aware that the languages taught in them are necessary to the
understanding of the writings of the ancients; that the grace of fable
stirs the mind; that the memorable deeds of history elevate it; and, if
read with discretion, aid in forming the judgment; that the perusal of all
excellent books is, as it were, to interview with the noblest men of past
ages, who have written them, and even a studied interview, in which
are discovered to us only their choicest thoughts; that eloquence has
incomparable force and beauty; that poesy has its ravishing graces and
delights; that in the mathematics there are many refined discoveries
eminently suited to gratify the inquisitive, as well as further all the arts
an lessen the labour of man; that numerous highly useful precepts and
exhortations to virtue are contained in treatises on morals; that theology
points out the path to heaven; that philosophy affords the means of
discoursing with an appearance of truth on all matters, and commands
the admiration of the more simple; that jurisprudence, medicine, and
the other sciences, secure for their cultivators honors and riches; and, in
fine, that it is useful to bestow some attention upon all, even upon those
abounding the most in superstition and error, that we may be in a
position to determine their real value, and guard against being
deceived.
But I believed that I had already given sufficient time to languages, and
likewise to the reading of the writings of the ancients, to their histories
and fables. For to hold converse with those of other ages
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