David DeAngelo - Double Your Dating - Sexual Communication Workbook | Page 5

words, they've done it so much and for
so long that it's just become part of their way of communicating.
Tests include: canceling plans with little or no notice, challenging you in front
of other people, playing games like asking for your number instead of giving hers,
asking for gifts or favors, getting upset or dramatic and seeing if you'll accept it,
and a million others.
But the question is WHY? Why do wo men test us? What's their motive?
The Fascinating Why
Women test men because they need to QUICKLY figure out what they're
dealing with, and they can't expect a man to just be straight up and honest about
his strengths and weaknesses.
I mean, let's face it... us guys like to talk a big game, but when it comes to
walking the talk, we often can't back it up.
Also, attractive women have a lot of op tions. They have their pick of men.
And attractive women prefer STRONG men.
Not physically strong (although this can be an advantage), but strong in
CHARACTER and PERSONALITY.
So let me ask you... if you were an attractive woman that was being chased
around by 100 guys, how would YOU go about figuring out which one or ones was
the ‘real deal’ and which were merely FAKING strength and confidence?
Of course... you'd have to TEST.
But you couldn't test by saying "OK, I' m going to give you a test now, so get
ready."
No no no.
You'd have to use ‘blind’ tests. Tests that would allow you to see a man's
true strengths and weaknesses. And in fact, you'd want to use tests that ideally
DIDN'T ALLOW HIM TO KNOW THAT YOU WERE TESTING... OR WHAT YOU HAD
DISCOVERED ABOUT HIM WITH THOSE TESTS. This way, if he turned out to be a
wussbag, you could slip away quickly and easily.
This would give you the power.
And if you did this OFTEN, you'd even tually become so accustomed to doing
it that MANY of the tests would becom e UNCONSCIOUS and work their way into
your NATURAL, EVERY-DAY way of communicating with men.
Well guess what?

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That's what's going on with attractive women.
Many of the tests that they use with men are actually OUTSIDE OF THEIR
AWARENESS. They test us automatically!
And if you fail one of these tests, there's a good chance that you won't get
another chance.
In this fast-paced world, we don't have time to get to know people over a
few months or years to figure out whether or not they're the kind of person that
would make a good friend or mate.
We need to know NOW.
So we use shortcuts.
Testing is a shortcut for women.
It lets them discover VERY RAPIDLY whether you have BALLS, or if you're
just another one of the bazillion wusses that are trying to get her attention.
Passing Women's Tests
If you know how to deal with a woman's tests and not let them affect you
emotionally, you'll maintain and increase the attraction level. If you start failing the
tests and turn into a WUSSY, chances are the tests will get more and more
uncomfortable and she'll probably be leaving shortly.
Women will always test you, so get over it.
Make sure when a woman tests you that you're ready for it, that you don't
take it personally, and that you know how to handle yourself. In fact, if you know
how to behave in the first place, you'll minimize the testing that occurs with
women, and even prevent a lot of it up front.
Rules Of Thumb
We're now going to talk about some rules of thumb for Sexual
Communication. Some are for dealing with tests, some are to prevent tests, and
some are tests of your own. These ideas, when combined, create a powerful
personality mix that is VERY interesting, unpredictable, and completely attractive to
women.
The key to remember is that, all together, these ideas create a whole picture,
a way of communicating that creates SEXUAL TENSION and leads to ATTRACTION.
A couple of concepts to keep in mind with these rules of thumb:
1. Stop with the idea of ‘just being yourself’. For most guys ‘just being
yourself’ is actually just being a manipulati ve, ass-kissing, wussy. It's nothing at all
like ACTUALLY ‘being yourself.’ The rules of ATTRACTION are very different from

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the rules of ‘how to be a nice, socially acceptable, accommodating guy’... remember
that.
2. Remember, women interpret everything. They're always asking "what did
that mean?" Men tend to take communication at face value, and women tend to
read into EVERYTHING. Learn to speak in CO DE instead of being EXPLICIT. If you're
explicit, you'll be suspect. The purpose of these