Count Fathom, part 2 | Page 4

I hope, will not be
found altogether deficient in the accomplishments of the sex. So that
we find means to make little parties, in which the time glides away
insensibly. Then I have a small collection of books which are at your
service. You may amuse yourself with Shakespeare, or Milton, or Don
Quixote, or any of our modern authors that are worth reading, such as
the Adventures of Loveill, Lady Frail, George Edwards, Joe Thompson,
Bampfylde Moore Carew, Young Scarron, and Miss Betsy Thoughtless;
and if you have a taste for drawing, I can entertain you with a parcel of
prints by the best masters."
A man of our hero's politeness could not help expressing himself in the
warmest terms of gratitude for this courteous declaration. He thanked
the captain in particular for his obliging offers, and begged he would be
so good as to present his respects to the society, of which he longed to
be a member. It was determined, therefore, that Minikin should return
in an hour, when the Count would be dressed, in order to conduct him
into the presence of his majesty; and he had already taken his leave for
the present, when all of a sudden he came back, and taking hold of a
waistcoat that lay upon a chair, "Sir," said he, "give me leave to look at
that fringe; I think it is the most elegant knitting I ever saw. But pray,
sir, are not these quite out of fashion? I thought plain silk, such as this
that I wear, had been the mode, with the pockets very low." Before
Fathom had time to make any sort of reply, he took notice of his hat
and pumps; the first of which, he said, was too narrow in the brims, and

the last an inch too low in the heels. Indeed, they formed a remarkable
contrast with his own; for, exclusive of the fashion of the cock, which
resembled the form of a Roman galley, the brim of his hat, if properly
spread, would have projected a shade sufficient to shelter a whole file
of musketeers from the heat of a summer's sun; and the heels of his
shoes were so high as to raise his feet three inches at least from the
surface of the earth.
Having made these observations, for the credit of his taste, he retired,
and returning at the time appointed, accompanied Ferdinand to the
apartment of the king, at the doors of which their ears were invaded
with a strange sound, being that of a human voice imitating the noise of
a drum. The captain, hearing this alarm, made a full stop, and, giving
the Count to understand that his majesty was busy, begged he would
not take it amiss, if the introduction should be delayed for a few
moments. Fathom, curious to know the meaning of what he had heard,
applied to his guide for information, and learned that the king and the
major, whom he had nominated to the post of his general-in-chief, were
employed in landing troops upon the Genoese territory; that is, that
they were settling beforehand the manner of their disembarkation.
He then, by the direction of his conductor, reconnoitred them through
the keyhole, and perceived the sovereign and his minister sitting on
opposite sides of a deal board table, covered with a large chart or map,
upon which he saw a great number of mussel and oyster shells ranged
in a certain order, and, at a little distance, several regular squares and
columns made of cards cut in small pieces. The prince himself, whose
eyes were reinforced by spectacles, surveyed this armament with great
attention, while the general put the whole in action, and conducted their
motions by beat of drum. The mussel-shells, according to Minikin's
explanation, represented the transports, the oyster-shells were
considered as the men-of-war that covered the troops in landing, and
the pieces of card exhibited the different bodies into which the army
was formed upon its disembarkation.
As an affair of such consequence could not be transacted without
opposition, they had provided divers ambuscades, consisting of the

enemy, whom they represented by grey peas; and accordingly General
Macleaver, perceiving the said grey peas marching along shore to
attack his forces before they could be drawn up in battalia, thus
addressed himself to the oyster-shells, in an audible voice:--"You
men-of-war, don't you see the front of the enemy advancing, and the
rest of the detachment following out of sight? Arrah! the devil burn you,
why don't you come ashore and open your batteries?" So saying, he
pushed the shells towards the breach, performed the cannonading with
his voice, the grey peas were soon put in confusion, the general was
beat, the cards marched forwards in order of battle, and the