A Select Collection of Old English Plays, Vol. IX | Page 9

_Nuncquam time_, never fear, She is unmarried, I swear. But, if I help you to the deed, Tu vis narrare how you speed.
Y. ART. Tell how I speed? ay, sir, I will to you: Then presently about it. Many thanks For this great kindness, Sir Aminadab. [Exit.
AMIN. If my puella prove a drab, I'll be reveng'd on both: ambo shall die; Shall die! by what? for ego I Have never handled, I thank God, Other weapon than a rod; I dare not fight for all my speeches. _Sed cave_, if I take him thus, Ego sum expers at untruss.
[Exit.

SCENE II.
_A Room in Justice Reason's House_.
Enter JUSTICE REASON, OLD MASTER ARTHUR, OLD MASTER LUSAM, MISTRESS ARTHUR, YOUNG MASTER LUSAM, and HUGH.
O. ART. We, Master Justice Reason, come about A serious matter that concerns us near.
O. LUS. Ay, marry, doth it, sir, concern us near; Would God, sir, you would take some order for it.
O. ART. Why, look ye, Master Lusam, you are such another, You will be talking what concerns us near, And know not why we come to Master Justice.
O. LUS. How? know not I?
O. ART. No, sir, not you.
O. LUS. Well, I know somewhat, though I know not that; Then on, I pray you.
JUS. Forward, I pray, [and] yet the case is plain.
O. ART. Why, sir, as yet you do not know the case.
O. LUS. Well, he knows somewhat; forward, Master Arthur.
O. ART. And, as I told you, my unruly son, Once having bid his wife home to my house, There took occasion to be much aggriev'd About some household matters of his own, And, in plain terms, they fell in controversy.
O. LUS. 'Tis true, sir, I was there the selfsame time, And I remember many of the words.
O. ART. Lord, what a man are you! you were not there That time; as I remember, you were rid Down to the North, to see some friends of yours.
O. LUS. Well, I was somewhere; forward, Master Arthur.
JUS. All this is well; no fault is to be found In either of the parties; pray, say on.
O. ART. Why, sir, I have not nam'd the parties yet, Nor touch'd the fault that is complain'd upon.
O. LUS. Well, you touch'd somewhat; forward, Master Arthur.
O. ART. And, as I said, they fell in controversy: My son, not like a husband, gave her words Of great reproof, despite, and contumely, Which she, poor soul, digested patiently; This was the first time of their falling out. As I remember, at the selfsame time One Thomas, the Earl of Surrey's gentleman, Din'd at my table.
O. LUS. I knew him well.
O. ART. You are the strangest man; this gentleman, That I speak of, I am sure you never saw; He came but lately from beyond the sea.
O. LUS. I am sure I know one Thomas;--forward, sir.
JUS. And is this all? Make me a _mittimus_, And send the offender straightways to the jail.
O. ART. First know the offender--now[13] began the strife Betwixt this gentlewoman and my son-- Since when, sir, he hath us'd her not like one That should partake his bed, but like a slave. My coming was that you, being in office And in authority, should call before you My unthrift son, to give him some advice, Which he will take better from you than me, That am his father. Here's the gentlewoman, Wife to my son, and daughter to this man, Whom I perforce compell'd to live with us.
JUS. All this is well; here is your son, you say, But she that is his wife you cannot find.
Y. LUS. You do mistake, sir, here's the gentlewoman; It is her husband that will not be found.
JUS. Well, all is one, for man and wife are one; But is this all?
Y. LUS. Ay, all that you can say, And much more than you can well put off.
JUS. Nay, if the case appear thus evident, Give me a cup of wine. What! man and wife To disagree! I prythee, fill my cup; I could say somewhat: tut, tut, by this wine, I promise you 'tis good canary sack.
MRS ART. Fathers, you do me open violence, To bring my name in question, and produce This gentleman and others here to witness My husband's shame in open audience. What may my husband think, when he shall know I went unto the Justice to complain? But Master Justice here, more wise than you, Says little to the matter, knowing well His office is no whit concern'd herein; Therefore with favour I will take my leave.
JUS. The woman saith but reason, Master Arthur, And therefore give her licence to depart.
O. LUS. Here is dry justice, not to bid us drink! Hark thee, my friend, I prythee lend thy cup; Now, Master Justice, hear me but one word; You think this woman hath had