Yorkshire Tales. Third Series | Page 6

they called hats, an as shoo put furst one an then another on to Hepsabah, he wor fairly surprised to discover what a bonny lukkin woman his dowter wor; an when shoo axt him which he liked best, he could nobbut say, "onny on em! suit thisen, lass!" an th' young woman smiled at him an sed, "It's nice when a gentleman likes to see his wife well dressed," an Sammywell blushed an sed "Hem! hem!" but didn't undeceive her. After tryin on abaat a scoor, nooan seemin to exactly suit Hepsabah, th' young woman browt another, an Sammywell's e'en fairly sparkled. "By th' heart!" he sed, "but that's what aw call a Bobby Dazzler!" an it wor plain to be seen at Hepsabah thowt soa too. "Aw should like it," shoo sed, "but awm feeared it'll cost a lot."
"Tha's nowt to do wi that. It's me at's to pay for it!" soa in a few minnits it wor packt in a box, an handed to her, an Sammywell tell'd her to tak it an get aghtside an wait for him an he'd bi wi her as sooin as he'd sattled for it. Hepsabah's face wor all smiles, tho' ther wor just a glisten o' tears in her een as shoo went away.
"An nah, young woman," sed Sammywell, as he held his purse in his hand, "ha mich do yo want?"
Shoo handed him th' bill, but he seemed as if he couldn't mak it aght, soa he put on his spectacles. "This is a mistak, Miss," he sed, "aw've nobbut agreed to pay for one."
"That's quite right, sir," shoo sed, "One hat,--twenty two and six."
"Twenty two fiddlesticks!"
"No, sir, twenty two shillings and six pence. That's not much for a gentleman to pay for his wife's hat."
"But shoo isn't mi wife! Shoo's nobbut mi dowter!"
"No one would think you had a daughter so old;--you must have married very young," sed th' young woman smilin at him in a way at made him feel funny all ovver.
He sed noa moor but handed her two soverins; shoo gave him his change, an he made th' best ov his way into th' street where Hepsabah wor waitin for him; then he lained his back agean a lamp-pooast as if he wor too waik to stand.
"Do yo feel sick, father?" sed Hepsabah.
"Eeah, aw think aw've getten a bit ov a sickener."
"It wor varry warm i' that shop."
"Eeah,--its th' hottest shop aw've ivver been in."
"Yo see, yo arn't used to buyin hats."
"Noa, an awm net likely to get used to it. Aw hooap thar't suited."
"O, father,--its a beauty! If aw can nobbut get my chap to buy me a costume to match it!"
"Tha'll nivver do that, Hepsabah, becoss he connot. If he'd to buy thee a costoom, as tha calls it, to match that, an pay for it at th' same rate as aw've paid for that hat, it ud cost him aboon a thaasand paand! What does to think it's cost me?"
"Aw can't guess."
"Twenty two shillin an sixpence! That's true whether tha believes it or net."
"Is that all! Why its as cheap as muck."
"Well, mak th' best on it, for tha'll get noa moor muck at th' same price aght o' me. But promise me at tha'll nivver tell thi mother! If shoo'd to get to know shoo wodn't be able to sleep for a wick. It's a scandlus shame, an aw've been swindled! Why, tha owt to ha getten a hat as big as a umbrella for that price."
"Well, if yo hadn't wanted me to have it yo shouldn't ha sed soa."
"Aw did want thi to have it, but it's price aw connot get ovver. Why it weighs nowt hardly. Its cost aboon five shillin an aance. Thee goa in an show it to thi mother an aw'll goa an get summat to steady mi narves."
Sammywell tried to keep his spirits up wi puttin some spirits daan, but he couldn't manage it, an it wor wi fear an tremblin at he lifted th' sneck when he went hooam. All lukt breet an cheerful an th' supper wor on th' table, an Mally's face showed noa sign o' ill temper. "Thank gooidness," he sed to hissen, "shoo hasn't been upstairs to caant th' brass yet."
"Come thi ways to thi supper, Sammywell, aw wor gettin uneasy abaat thi."
"Has Hepsabah been?" he axt.
"Eeah. An shoo's shown me her new hat, an aw must say aw didn't gie thi credit for havin sich gooid taste. Shoo's famously suited, an awm pleeased to think tha's acted as a father should act for once. Aw do believe if tha could nobbut live long enuff aw should be able to mak a daycent chap on thi at th' finish."
"Did shoo say owt abaght what it cost?"
"Nay shoo didn't, an aw nivver