Yollop | Page 6

someone there in a few minutes. Did
you say Yullup?"
Smilk: "No. I said hurry up."

CHAPTER TWO

"The thing that's troubling me now," said Mr. Yollop, as Smilk hung up
the receiver and twisted his head slightly to peek out of the corner of
his eye, "is how to get hold of my slippers. You've no idea how cold
this floor is."
"If it's half as cold as the sweat I'm---"
"We're likely to have a long wait," went on the other, frowning. "It will
probably take the police a couple of hours to find this building, with

absolutely no clue except the number and the name of the street."
"I'll tell you what you might do, Mr. Scollop, seein' as you won't trust
me to go in and find your slippers for you. Why don't you sit on your
feet? Take that big arm chair over there and--"
"Splendid! By jove, Cassius, you are an uncommonly clever chap. I'll
do it. And then, when the police arrive, we'll have something for them
to do. We'll let them see if they can find my slippers. That ought to be
really quite interesting."
"There's something about you," said Mr. Smilk, not without a touch of
admiration in his voice, "that I simply can't help liking."
"That's what the wolf said to Little Red Riding-Hood, if I remember
correctly. However, I thank you, Cassius. In spite of the thump I gave
you and the disgusting way in which I treated you, a visitor in my own
house, you express a liking for me. It is most gratifying. Still, for the
time being, I believe we can be much better friends if I keep this pistol
pointed at you. Now we 'll do a little maneuvering. You may remain
seated where you are. However, I must ask you to pull out the two
lower drawers in the desk,--one on either side of where your knees go.
You will find them quite empty and fairly commodious. Now, put your
right foot in the drawer on this side and your left foot in the other
one--yes, I know it's quite a stretch, but I dare say you can manage it.
Sort of recalls the old days when evil-doers were put in the stocks,
doesn't it? They seem to be quite a snug fit, don't they? If it is as
difficult for you to extricate your feet from those drawers as it was to
insert them, I fancy I'm pretty safe from a sudden and impulsive dash in
my direction. Rather bright idea of mine, eh?"
"I'm beginnin' to change my opinion of you," announced Mr. Smilk.
Mr. Yollop pushed a big unholstered library chair up to the opposite
side of the desk and, after several awkward attempts, succeeded in
sitting down, tailor fashion, with his feet neatly tucked away beneath
him.
"I wasn't quite sure I could do it," said he, rather proudly. "I suppose
my feet will go to sleep in a very short time, but I am assuming,
Cassius, that you are too much of a gentleman to attack a man whose
feet are asleep."
"I wouldn't even attack you if they were snoring," said Cassius,
grinning in spite of himself. "Say, this certainly beats anything I've ever

come up against. If one of my pals was to happen to look in here right
now and see me with my feet in these drawers and you squattin' on
yours,--well, I can't help laughin' myself, and God knows I hate to."
"You were saying a little while ago," said Mr. Yollop, shifting his
position slightly, "that you rather fancy the idea of being arrested. Isn't
that a little quixotic, Mr. Smilk?"
"Huh?"
"I mean to say, do you expect me to believe you when you say you
relish being arrested?"
"I don't care a whoop whether you believe it or not. It's true."
"Have you no fear of the law?"
"Bless your heart, sir, I don't know how I'd keep body and soul together
if it wasn't for the law. If people would only let the law alone, I'd be
one of the happiest guys on earth. But, damn 'em, they won't let it alone.
First, they put their heads together and frame up this blasted parole
game on us. Just about the time we begin to think we're comfortably
settled up the river, 'long cmes some doggone home-wrecker and gets
us out on parole. Then we got to go to work and begin all over again.
Sometimes, the way things are nowadays, it takes months to get back
into the pen again. We got to live, ain't we? We got to eat, ain't we?
Well, there you are. Why can't they leave us alone instead of drivin' us
out into a cold,