Torchy as a Pa | Page 5

of getting together."
"That's it, precisely!" says Vee. "So why should you wish yourself back
in China?"
"I beg pardon?" says Mrs. Bill.
"I mean," says Vee, "that here is a missionary field, right at your door.
If you can go off among foreigners and get them to give up some of
their silly ways and organize them into groups and classes, why can't
you do something of the kind for these silly New York flat dwellers?
Can't they be organized, too?"
"Why," says Mrs. Bill, her eyes openin' wider, "I never thought of that.
But--but there are so many of them."
"What about starting with your own block?" suggests Vee. "Perhaps
with only one side of the street at first. Couldn't you find out how many
were interested in one particular thing--music, or dancing, or
bridge--and get them together?"
"Oh, I see!" says Mrs. Bill, clappin' her hands, enthusiastic. "Make a
social survey. Why, of course. One could get up a sort of questionnaire
card and drop it in the letter boxes for each family to fill out, if they
cared to do so, and then you could call meetings of the various groups."
"If I could find a few home folks from Virginia, that's all I would ask,"
says Lucy Lee.
"Then we would start the card with 'Where born?'" says Mrs. Bill.
"That would show us how many were Southerners, how many from the
West, from New England, and so on. Next we would want to know

something about their ages."
"Not too much," suggests Hamilton Blake. "Better ask 'em if they're
over or under thirty."
"Of course," says Mrs. Bill. "Let's see how such a card would look.
Next we would ask them what amusements they liked best: music,
dancing, theatre going, bowling, bridge, private theatricals, chess and
so on. Please check with a cross. And are you a high-brow; if so, why?
Is it art, books, languages, or the snare drum?"
"Don't forget the poker fiends and the movie fans," I puts in.
Mrs. Bill writes that down. "We will have to begin by electing
ourselves an organizing committee," says she, "and we will need a
small printing fund."
"I'll chip in ten," says Mr. Blake.
"So will we," says Vee.
"And I am sure Bill will, too," says Mrs. Fairfield, "which will be quite
enough to print all the cards we need. And tomorrow evening we will
get together in our apartment and make out the questionnaire complete.
Shall we?"
So when we left to catch a late train for Long Island it looked like West
Hundred and Umpty Umpt street was going to have something new
sprung on it. Course, we didn't know how far these two young couples
would get towards reformin' New York, but they sure was in earnest,
'specially young Mrs. Bill, who seems to have more or less common
sense tucked away between her ears.
That must have been a week or ten days ago, and as we hadn't heard
from any of them, or seen anything in the papers, we was kind of
curious. So here yesterday I has to call up Lucy Lee on the 'phone.
"Say," says I, "how's that block sociable progressin'?"

"Oh, perfectly wonderful!" says Lucy Lee. "Why, at our first meeting,
in a big dance hall, we had nearly 300 persons and were almost
swamped. But Esther is a perfect wizard at organizing. She got them
into groups in less than half an hour, and before we adjourned they had
formed all kinds of clubs and associations, from subscription dance
clubs to a Lord Dunsany private theatrical club. Everyone in the block
who didn't turn out at first has been clamoring to get in since and it has
been keeping us busy sorting them out. You've no idea what a
difference it makes up here. Why, I know almost everybody in the
building now, and some of them are really charming people. They're
beginning to seem like real neighbors and I don't think we shall ever
pass another dull evening while we live here. Even folks across the
street have heard about it and want Esther to come over and organize
them."
So I had quite a bulletin to take home to Vee.
"Isn't that splendid!" says she.
"Anyway," says I, "I guess you started something. If it spreads enough,
maybe New York'll be almost fit to live in. But I have my doubts."
CHAPTER II
WHEN HALLAM WAS RUNG UP
It ain't often Mr. Robert starts something he can't finish. When he does,
though, he's shifty at passin' it on. Yes, I'll say he is. For in such cases
I'm apt to be the one that's handiest, and you know what that means. It's
a matter of Torchy being joshed into tacklin' any old