Three Plays | Page 4

he fell right in it. Trying to ride de britches! Now look at him.
Good Black Aw, shut up! You tryin' to show yo' grandma how to milk ducks. You can't beat me playin' no checkers. (Scratches his head again) Just watch me show my glory.
Woman (Leans out of window) Good Black! When you gointer come git dese clothes! (He does not answer, he is trying to concentrate)
Lonnie You got him Cliffert. You got him in Louisville Loop. He's yo' fish all right.
Cliffert (Boastfully) Man, didn't I push a mean chuck-a-luck dat time! I'm good, better, and best. Move, Man! (To Good Black) I tole you not to do it.
Good Black All dat noise ain't playin' checkers. You just wait till I make my move.
Woman All right, now, Mr. Nappy-Chin! I don't want to have to call you no mo' to come keer dese white folks clothes! I'm tired of takin' and takin' affa you! My belly's full clear up to de neck. I don't need no lazy coon lak you nohow. I'm a good woman, and I needs somebody dats gointer give aid and assistance.
Good Black, Aw, go head on', woman, and leave me be! Every Saturday it's de same thing! Yo' mouth exhausting like a automobile. You worse than "cryin' Emma". You kin whoop like de Seaboard and squall lak de Coast Line. (Taps his head) You ain't go all dat b'long to you, and nothin' dat b'long to nobody's else. You better leave me 'lone before you make a bad man out of me. Fool wid me and I'll go git me somebody else. I'm a much-right man.
Woman Now you ain't no much right man neither. You didn't git me wid no saw-mill license--You went to de court house and paid a dollar and a half for me. Tain't no other woman got as much right to you as I got. De Man to tell you youse divorced befo' yo' kin play dat much-right on me!
Good Black De Man don't have to tell me nothin'! I got divorce in my heels.
Woman You ain't de only one dat knows where de railroad track is, I done made up my mind, and I done promised Gabriel and a couple of other men dat if yo' don't do no better than yo' been doin', I'm gointer pack me a suit case and grab de first smoky thing I see. I'll be long gone.
Good Black Aw, yo' ain't no trouble! Yo' can be had. Yo' ain't never gointer leave me.
Woman How come I won't? Just 'cause I been takin' keer of yo', don't make a park ape out yo'self. I'll leave yo', just as sure as yo' snore!
Good Black (Rises and hitches up his trousers) Aw, yo' ain't gointer leave me, and if yo' go, yo' wouldn't stay, 'cause I'm a damn sweet man, and yo' know it!
Lonnie Hey, Hey! (He begins to pick and Good Black sings. Lonnie sings a line now and then)
Good Black Yo' may leave and go to Hali-muh-fack But my slow drag will--uh bring yo' back Well yo' may go, but this will bring yo' back
I been in de country but I moved to town I'm a tolo-shaker from my head on down Well, yo' may go, but this will bring yo' back
Some folks call me a tolo-shaker It's a doggone lie I'm a back-bone breaker Well, yo' may go, but this will bring yo' back.
Oh, ship on de sea, boat on de ocean I raise hell when I take a notion Well, yo' may go, but this will bring yo' back.
Oh, who do, who do, who do wackin' Wid my hells a' poppin' and my toe-nails crackin' Well, yo' may go, but this will bring yo' back.
Woman Dat's all right too, pap but if yo' can't make me tote dese clothes home, don't bring de mess up. Yo'se abstifically a humbug.
Cliffert Man, come on back here and move, or else own up to de folks yo' can't push no checkers wid me. (He sits and begins to lay out moves with his fingers and scratch his head. Enter another MAN and stands akimbo looking over Cliff's shoulder)
Cliff (Looking up) Don't stand over me lak dat, ugly as yo' is.
Man (Skanko) You ain't nobody's pretty baby yo'self!
Cliff Dat's all right, I ain't as ugly as yo'--youse ugly enough to git behind a Simpoon weed and hatch monkies.
Man (Skanko) And youse ugly enough to git behind a tombstone and hatch hants.
Cliff Youse so ugly dey have to cover yo' face up at night so sleep can slip up on yo'.
Man (Skanko) You look like ten cents worth of Have-Mercy. Yo' face look lak ole Uncle Jump-off. Yo' mouth look lak a bunch of ruffles.
Cliff Yeah, but yo' done passed me. Yo' so ugly till they could throw yo'