Three Men on the Bummel | Page 7

Goyles, "dead's the right word to use, for dead
we'd all be, bar Providence, if we was to put out in this. You see, sir,"
he explained, in answer to my look of surprise, "this is what we call a
'land wind,' that is, it's a-blowing, as one might say, direct off the land."
When I came to think of it the man was right; the wind was blowing off
the land.
"It may change in the night," said Captain Goyles, more hopefully
"anyhow, it's not violent, and she rides well."
Captain Goyles resumed his cigar, and I returned aft, and explained to
Ethelbertha the reason for the delay. Ethelbertha, who appeared to be
less high spirited than when we first boarded, wanted to know WHY
we couldn't sail when the wind was off the land.
"If it was not blowing off the land," said Ethelbertha, "it would be
blowing off the sea, and that would send us back into the shore again. It
seems to me this is just the very wind we want."
I said: "That is your inexperience, love; it SEEMS to be the very wind
we want, but it is not. It's what we call a land wind, and a land wind is
always very dangerous."
Ethelbertha wanted to know WHY a land wind was very dangerous.
Her argumentativeness annoyed me somewhat; maybe I was feeling a
bit cross; the monotonous rolling heave of a small yacht at anchor
depresses an ardent spirit.
"I can't explain it to you," I replied, which was true, "but to set sail in
this wind would be the height of foolhardiness, and I care for you too
much, dear, to expose you to unnecessary risks."
I thought this rather a neat conclusion, but Ethelbertha merely replied

that she wished, under the circumstances, we hadn't come on board till
Tuesday, and went below.
In the morning the wind veered round to the north; I was up early, and
observed this to Captain Goyles.
"Aye, aye, sir," he remarked; "it's unfortunate, but it can't be helped."
"You don't think it possible for us to start to-day?" I hazarded.
He did not get angry with me, he only laughed.
"Well, sir," said he, "if you was a-wanting to go to Ipswich, I should
say as it couldn't be better for us, but our destination being, as you see,
the Dutch coast--why there you are!"
I broke the news to Ethelbertha, and we agreed to spend the day on
shore. Harwich is not a merry town, towards evening you might call it
dull. We had some tea and watercress at Dovercourt, and then returned
to the quay to look for Captain Goyles and the boat. We waited an hour
for him. When he came he was more cheerful than we were; if he had
not told me himself that he never drank anything but one glass of hot
grog before turning in for the night, I should have said he was drunk.
The next morning the wind was in the south, which made Captain
Goyles rather anxious, it appearing that it was equally unsafe to move
or to stop where we were; our only hope was it would change before
anything happened. By this time, Ethelbertha had taken a dislike to the
yacht; she said that, personally, she would rather be spending a week in
a bathing machine, seeing that a bathing machine was at least steady.
We passed another day in Harwich, and that night and the next, the
wind still continuing in the south, we slept at the "King's Head." On
Friday the wind was blowing direct from the east. I met Captain Goyles
on the quay, and suggested that, under these circumstances, we might
start. He appeared irritated at my persistence.
"If you knew a bit more, sir," he said, "you'd see for yourself that it's

impossible. The wind's a-blowing direct off the sea."
I said: "Captain Goyles, tell me what is this thing I have hired? Is it a
yacht or a house-boat?"
He seemed surprised at my question.
He said: "It's a yawl."
"What I mean is," I said, "can it be moved at all, or is it a fixture here?
If it is a fixture," I continued, "tell me so frankly, then we will get some
ivy in boxes and train over the port-holes, stick some flowers and an
awning on deck, and make the thing look pretty. If, on the other hand, it
can be moved--"
"Moved!" interrupted Captain Goyles. "You get the right wind behind
the Rogue--"
I said: "What is the right wind?"
Captain Goyles looked puzzled.
"In the course of this week," I went on, "we have had wind from the
north, from the south, from the east, from the west--with variations. If
you can think