Three Comedies | Page 9

was possible to move it?
Laura. But what were you shouting about?
Axel. I only wanted to try if I had any voice left.
Laura. If you had any voice left?
Mother. There is a big wood near the house, where you can practise
that.
Father. And a waterfall--if you are anxious to emulate Demosthenes.
Laura. Axel, dear--are you out of your mind?
Axel. No, but I think I soon shall be.
Mother. Is there anything wrong?
Axel. Yes, a great deal.
Mother. What is it? Some unpleasant news by post?
Axel. No, not that--but I am unhappy.
Mother. Two days after your wedding?
Father. You have a very odd way of showing it.
Axel. I am taken like that sometimes.
Mother. But what is it? Evidently you are not as happy as we hoped
you would be. Confide in us, Axel; we are your parents now, you
know.
Axel. It is something I have been thinking about for a long time, but
have not had the courage to mention.
Mother. Why? Aren't we good to you?

Axel. You are much too good to me.
Father. What do you mean by that?
Axel. That everything is made far too smooth for me here; my faculties
get no exercise; I cannot satisfy my longing for activity and
conflict--nor my ambition.
Father. Dear me! What do you want, if you please?
Axel. I want to work for myself, to owe my position in life to my own
efforts--to become something.
Father. Really.--What a foolish idea! (Moves towards the door.)
Mother. But an idea we must take an interest in. He is our child's
husband now, remember. What do you want to be, my boy? Member of
Parliament?
Axel. No; but my uncle, who has about the largest legal practice in
these parts, offered long ago to hand it over to me.
Mother. But you wouldn't be able to look after it from here, would you,
Axel?
Father (at the door). A ridiculous idea!--Come back to breakfast. (Turns
to go.)
Mother. That is true, isn't it? You couldn't look after it from here?
Axel. No; but I can move into town.
All. Move into town? (A pause. The FATHER turns back from the
door.)
Father. That is still more impossible, of course.
Mother. There must be something at the bottom of this. Is anything
worrying you? (Lowering her voice.) Are you in debt?

Axel. No, thanks to the kindness of you two. You have freed me from
that.
Mother. Then what is it, Axel? You have been so, strange lately-- what
is it, my dear boy?
Father. Nonsensical ideas--probably his stomach is disordered.
Remember the last time I ate lobster!--Come along in and have a glass
of sherry, and you will forget all about it.
Axel. No, it isn't a thing one can forget. It is always in my
thoughts--more and more insistently. I must have work for my
mind--some outlet for my ambition. I am bored here.
Mother. Two days after your wedding!
Father. Set to work then, for heaven's sake! What is there to hinder you?
Would you like to take charge of one of my farms? Or to start some
improvements on the estate?--or anything you please! I have no doubt
you have ideas, and I will provide the money--only do not let us have
any of this fuss!
Axel. But then I shall be indebted to you for everything, and shall feel
dependent.
Father. So you would rather feel indebted to your uncle?
Axel. He will give me nothing. I must buy it from him.
Father. Really!--How?
Axel. With my work and my--. Oh well, I suppose you would lend me
a little capital?
Father. Not a penny.
Axel. But why?
Father. I will tell you why. Because my son in law must be my

son-in-law, and not a speculating lawyer who sits with his door open
and a sign hung out to beg for custom.
Axel. Is a lawyer's profession a dishonourable one, then?
Father. No, it is not. But you have been received into one of the oldest
and richest families in the country, and you owe some respect to its
traditions. Generation after generation, from time immemorial, the
heads of our family have been lords of the manor --not office seekers or
fortune hunters. The honourable offices I have held have all been
offered to me and not sought by me; and I am not going to have you
chattering about your university degree or your talents. You shall stay
quietly here, and you will be offered more than you want.
Mother. Come, come, my dear, don't get heated over it; that always
makes you so unwell. Let us arrive at some arrangement without
wrangling. Axel, you must be reasonable; you know he cannot stand
any over-exertion. Laura, get