The Whores and Bawds Answer to the Fifteen Comforts of Whoring

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Responses From Women, by Various
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Title: The Fifteen Comforts of Matrimony: Responses From Women
Author: Various
Release Date: November 8, 2004 [EBook #13972]
Language: English
Character set encoding: ASCII
0. START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK FIFTEEN
COMFORTS OF MATRIMONY ***
Produced by David Starner, Fred Robinson and the Online Distributed
Proofreading Team.
[Transcriber's Note: The following was proofread from what appear to
be scans of photocopies of a reproduction of the original text. On top of
the original's battered type-face and archaic spellings, this preparer, and
the proofreaders before him, have had to contend with dirty or faded
images and missing margins. We have made our best guesses as to the
missing letters, but in some cases we were stymied; those few places
are marked with [*?]. In addition, the most obvious printer's mistakes
(transposed, missing, obviously incorrect, and even upside-down letters)
have been corrected.]

THE

Whores and Bawd's
ANSWER
TO THE
Fifteen Comforts
OF
WHORING
[Illustration]
Printed in the Year, 1706.
The PREFACE.
_Indeed we the Ladies of Pleasures, and those that stile themselves
Procurers in Love Affairs, highly resent the late Paper put out against
our Profession and bespattering of us for using only our own; but since
it is the Way of the World for most Men to be inclinable to love Lac'd
Mutton, I think it is their Duty to resent the Affront with us so much, as
to Satyrize the Author of the_ Fifteen Comforts of Whoring, _who
without is some young bashful Effeminate Fool or another, that knows
not how to say_ Boh to a Goose; _or some old suffocated old Wretch
so far pass'd his Labour, that he scolds for Madness that he cannot give
a buxom young Lass her Benevolence; or else he may an hundred to
one be one of Captain_ Risby's _Fraternity, and so must needs be a
Woman Hater by Course. But let him be what he will, so long as our
Impudence is Case-harden'd we value not his Reflections, and therefore
will not leave our Vocation tho' Claps and Poxes shou'd be our Portion
every Day for according to an eminent Whore now Deceas'd,_
Clap, clap ye Whores, Clap as Clap can,
Some Clap to Women, we'll Clap the Men.
THE
Whores and Bawds, Answer, &c.
_The first Comfort of Whoring, Answer'd._

No sooner does a Maid arrive to Years,
And she the Pleasures of
Conjunction hears,
But strait her Maidenhead a Tip-toe runs,
To get
her like, in Daughters or in Sons;
Upon some jolly Lad she casts her
Eye,
And with some am'rous Gestures by the by;
She gives him
great Encouragement to take
His fill of Love, and swears that for his
sake
She soon shall Die; which makes the Youth so hot
To get
about the Maiden's Honey-pot,
That promising her Marriage and the
like,
They both a Bargain very quickly Strike;
[*?] Rubbers often
take till she does prove
With Child, then she bids adieu to Love;

And e're she's brought to Bed away does Creep,
For fear he should
the Wenche's Urchin keep.
_The Second Comfort of Whoring, Answer'd._
Now when a Maid has crackt her Maidenhead,
By being once or
twice (Sir) brought to Bed,
Her Credit then's so broke that all her Wit,

And Policy cannot a Husband get;
But yet not being out of Heart
she Cries,
From Marriage keeping I shall be more wise,
For if he's
not a Fool he soon will find,
I had before I'd him to some been kind,

Then how he'd call me arrant Bitch and Whore,
And Swear some
Stallion had been there before;
Then leave me, Wherefore I will
single Live,
And my Invention to decoying give,
For as I was by
fickle Man betray'd,
So Men by me too shall be Bubbles made,
Till
the dull Sots clandestine Means do take,
In robbing Masters,for a
Strumpets sake,
For which if they shou'd at the Gallows Swing,

Their End I'd in some merry Ditty Sing.
_ The Third Comfort of whoring answer'd._
What tho' of Whoring