The Voyage of the Hoppergrass | Page 4

Hoyt
what under the canopy possessed him to give her a name like that. Said
his father named her. Well, I thought his father must be plumb foolish,
or something, but I didn't like to say so to HIM. Seems too bad to waste
them gilt letters, or I'd a-had another name on her 'fore this. I wanted to
use as many of them letters as I could, an' I thought of callin' her for my
aunt, over at Greenland."
"What is your aunt's name?" inquired Jimmy Toppan.
"Hannah J. Pettingell."

"Isn't that too long a name?"
"Too long? 'Taint as long as the 'Abbie and Elizabeth Sweetser' that I
went out to Calcutta in, summer of '68. And yer see I could use some of
them letters,--the H, an' the P, an' the G,--but not all of 'em."
"I don't think I like that name as well as 'Hoppergrass,'" said Jimmy.
"Anything's better'n that," replied the Captain, decidedly. "Besides, my
aunt was a sort of benefactor of mine,--she always said I was her
fav'rite nephew."
"Is she dead?"
"Died seven year ago this spring, while I was in New Orleans. She left
me her second best ear-trumpet,--she was deef as a post. She had two of
'em. One was a rubber toob sort of thing,--pretty nigh four foot long.
She only used that on Sundays, an' when the minister called. She left
me the other, an' I've got it to home, over the parlor mantelpiece."
I remembered seeing it there, when I had called on the Captain. He
lived all alone on West Injy Lane, in a house full of cats and curiosities.
The ear-trumpet always had a bouquet of dried flowers stuffed in the
big end, and I had supposed that it was a speaking- trumpet. I thought
the Captain had used it to shout orders through, when his ship was
going round Cape Horn in a gale. It disappointed me to hear that it was
nothing but his aunt's ear- trumpet. And I couldn't see why Miss
Hannah Pettingell, who had only left the Captain her ear-trumpet (and
the second-best one, besides) had any right to have the boat's name
changed in her honor.
"I like the name, just as it is," I said.
"Do yer?" inquired the Captain. "Well, there's no accountin' for tastes,
as the man said when he found the monkey eatin' glue."
This seemed to be a joke on me. Ed and Jimmy joined the Captain in
laughing, and I felt rather put down. But we soon had something else to

think of, for we went on another tack to enter Sandy Island River. A
bridge crossed this river, not far from the mouth, and the draw had to
be turned to let us through. Ed Mason got a long fish-horn from the
cabin, and began to blow it. After a while the old draw-tender, who
lived in a shanty, quarter of a mile away, came hobbling up the road.
He slowly swung open the draw, and then, as we approached the bridge,
peered down at us.
"This yer new boat, Lem?" said he to the Captain.
"This is her, right enough," said our skipper.
"Sets kinder high in the water, don't she?"
The aged draw-tender had the air of a man who was expected to find
fault, and was quite able to do it.
"Hadn't noticed it," replied the Captain, shortly.
He was attending closely to sailing the boat through the narrow gap in
the bridge. The old man cackled.
"Guess you'll find, when you git her outside, that them boys 'll wish
you had some more ballast in her."
Then he caught sight of the name on the stern.
"Hopper-grass! Hoppergrass! Where didger git that air name, Lem?
Invent it yerself?"
"No, I didn't," said the Captain. He was very much irritated, and he did
not look around.
"Well, then, if 'taint yer own inventin', I jes as soon tell yer-- if yer ask
ME,--that it's the most ding-busted, tom-fool name I ever see on a
cat-boat in all my born days."
"Well, I didn't ask yer," shouted Captain Bannister, "an' it don't matter
two cents to me WHAT you think."

The ancient cackled again. Either he was deaf, or else he was
pretending not to hear, in order to thorn the Captain. He kept on with
his remarks.
"Yessir, the very WUST I ever see on the stern of a boat. That's what I
think, Lem, an' you can take it or leave it."
There was nothing to do but leave it, for we had already left the bridge
behind, and were feoon too far away to hear the critic's remarks. He
continued to give us his opinion, however, for we could see his jaw
move, though we could not make out a