The Three Cutters | Page 7

rewarded
with his rank as commander. It is a pity that what he takes inside of him
does not count, for he takes it morning, noon, and night. He is just
filling his fourteenth glass; he always keeps a regular account, as he
never exceeds his limited number, which is seventeen; then he is
exactly down to his bearings.
The master's mate's name is Tomkins; he has served his six years three
times over, and has now outgrown his ambition; which is fortunate for
him, as his chances of promotion are small. He prefers a small vessel to
a large one, because he is not obliged to be so particular in his
dress--and looks for his lieutenancy whenever there shall be another
charity promotion. He is fond of soft bread, for his teeth are all absent
without leave; he prefers porter to any other liquor, but he can drink his
glass of grog, whether it be based upon rum, brandy or the liquor now
before him.
Mr Smith is the name of that young gentleman whose jacket is so out at
the elbows; he has been intending to mend it these last two months; but
is too lazy to go to his chest for another. He has been turned out of half
the ships in the service for laziness; but he was born so--and therefore it
is not his fault. A revenue-cutter suits him, she is half her time hove to;
and he has no objection to boat-service, as he sits down always in the
stern-sheets, which is not fatiguing. Creeping for tubs is his delight, as
he gets over so little ground. He is fond of grog, but there is some
trouble in carrying the tumbler so often to his mouth; so he looks at it,
and lets it stand. He says little because he is too lazy to speak. He has
served more than eight years; but as for passing--it has never come into
his head. Such are the three persons who are now sitting in the cabin of
the revenue-cutter, drinking hot gin-toddy.
"Let me see, it was, I think, in ninety-three or ninety-four. Before you

were in the service, Tomkins--"
"Maybe, sir; it's so long ago since I entered, that I can't recollect
dates--but this I know, that my aunt died three days before."
"Then the question is, when did your aunt die?"
"Oh! She died about a year after my uncle."
"And when did your uncle die?"
"I'll be hanged if I know!"
"Then, d'ye see, you've no departure to work from. However, I think
you cannot have been in the service at that time. We were not quite so
particular about uniform as we are now."
"Then I think the service was all the better for it. Now-a-days, in your
crack ships, a mate has to go down in the hold or spirit-room, and after
whipping up fifty empty casks, and breaking out twenty full ones, he is
expected to come on quarter-deck as clean as if he was just come out of
a band-box."
"Well, there's plenty of water alongside, as far as the outward man goes,
and iron dust is soon brushed off. However, as you say, perhaps a little
too much is expected; at least, in five of the ships in which I was
first-lieutenant, the captain was always hauling me over the coals about
the midshipmen not dressing properly, as if I was their dry-nurse. I
wonder what Captain Prigg would have said if he had seen such a
turn-out as you, Mr Smith, on his quarter-deck."
"I should have had one turn-out more," drawled Smith.
"With your out-at-elbows jacket, there, eh!" continued Mr Appleboy.
Smith turned up his elbows, looked at one and then at the other; after so
fatiguing an operation, he was silent.
"Well, where was I? Oh! It was about ninety-three or ninety-four, as I

said that it happened--Tomkins, fill your glass and hand me the sugar--
how do I get on? This is Number 15," said Appleboy, counting some
white lines on the table by him; and taking up a piece of chalk, he
marked one more line on his tally. "I don't think this is so good a tub as
the last, Tomkins, there's a twang about it--a want of juniper; however,
I hope, we shall have better luck this time. Of course you know we sail
to-morrow?"
"I presume so, by the leg of mutton coming on board."
"True--true; I'm regular--as clock-work. After being twenty years a
first-lieutenant one gets a little method. I like regularity. Now the
admiral has never omitted asking me to dinner once, every time I have
come into harbour, except this time. I was so certain of it, that I never
expected to sail; and I have but two shirts