around this part of the country, too, and I know that. And this stealing has got to stop. I've got to catch that thief. And to catch him I've got to have a clue. A clue is something he has left around, or dropped, where he was stealing. Now, did that chicken thief drop any clues in your chicken yard? That's what I want to know--did he drop any clues?"
"Mebby, if he dropped some cloos, those toober-chlosis bugs eat them up," suggested Mrs. Gratz. "They eats bones and fedders; mebby they eats cloos, too."
"Now, ain't that smart?" sneered the thin Santa Claus. "Don't you think you're funny? But I'll tell you the clue I'm looking for. Did that thief drop a pocketbook, or anything like that?"
"Oh, a pocketbook!" said Mrs. Gratz. "How much should be in such a pocketbook, mebby?"
"Nine hundred dollars," said the thin Santa Claus promptly.
"Goodness!" exclaimed Mrs. Gratz. "So much money all in one cloos! Come out to the chicken yard once; I'll help hunt for cloos, too."
The thin Santa Claus stood a minute looking doubtfully at Mrs. Gratz. Her face was large and placid and unemotional.
"Well," he said with a sigh, "it ain't much use, but I'll try it again."
When he had gone, after another close search of the chicken yard and coop, Mrs. Gratz returned to her friend, Mrs. Flannery.
"Purty soon I don't belief any more in Santy Claus at all," she said. "Purty soon I have more beliefs in chicken thiefs than in Santy Claus. Yet a while I beliefs in him, but, one more of those come-agains, and I don't."
"He'll not be comin' back any more," said Mrs. Flannery positively. "I'm wonderin' he came at all, and the jail so handy. All ye have t' do is t' call a cop."
"Sure!" said Mrs. Gratz. "But it is not nice I should put Santy Claus in jail. Such a liberal Santy Claus, too."
"Have it yer own way, ma'am," said Mrs. Flannery. "I'll own 'tis some different whin chickens is stole. 'Tis hard to expind th' affections on a bunch of chickens, but, if any one was t' steal my pig, t' jail he would go, Santy Claus or no Santy Claus. Not but what ye have a kind heart anyway, ma'am, not wantin' t' put th' poor fellow in jail whin he has already lost nine hundred dollars, which, goodness knows, ye might have t' hand back, was th' law t' take a hand in it."
"So!" said Mrs. Gratz. "Such is the law, yet? All right, I don't belief in chicken thiefs, no matter how much he comes again. I stick me to Santy Claus. Always will I belief in Santy Claus. Chicken thiefs gives, and wants to take away again, but Santy Claus is always giving and never taking."
"Ye 're fergettin' th' chickens that was took," suggested Mrs. Flannery.
"Took?" said Mrs. Gratz.
"Tooken," Mrs. Flannery corrected.
"Tooked?" said Mrs. Gratz. "I beliefs me not in Santy Claus that way. I beliefs he is a good old man. For givings I beliefs in Santy Claus, but for takings I beliefs in toober-chlosis bugs."
"An' th' busted padlock, then?" asked Mrs. Flannery.
"Ach!" exclaimed Mrs. Gratz. "Them reindeers is so frisky, yet. They have a right to kick up and bust it, mebby."
Mrs. Flannery sighed.
"'T is a grand thing t' have faith, ma'am," she said.
"Y-e-s," said Mrs. Gratz indolently, "that's nice. And it is nice to have nine hundred dollars more in the bank, ain't it?"
THE END
BY THE SAME AUTHOR
That Pup
The Great American Pie Company
Pigs is Pigs
Mike Flannery on Duty and Off
Kilo
Little Comic Masterpieces
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The comic classic that made the Nation laugh. Nearly 200,000 copies have been sold.
THE GREAT AMERICAN PIE COMPANY
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"If read aloud in his presence it would convulse a wooden Indian." Des Moines Mail and Times.
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This has been called the best story that ever appeared in _McClure's Magazine_. A really humorous tale of an inebriated youth.
BREEZY
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A breezily humorous, great little business story. Breezy is distinctly an American product, and his success is an inspiration.
THE PETS
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Red Saunders's curious menagerie, and the tale of a "scrap" that will make you weep for joy.
MIKE FLANNERY
By ELLIS PARKER BUTLER
Mike Flannery, the express agent of "Pigs is Pigs" fame, in some more genuinely laughable situations.
THAT PUP
By ELLIS PARKER BUTLER
The funniest dog story in years, "One prolonged howl of laughter." Springfield Union.
THE BIG STRIKE AT SIWASH
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One of the most rousingly funny football stories that have ever appeared in print, by our new humorist.
WARRIOR, THE UNTAMED
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What happened after Warrior, the "man-eating" lion of Paradise Park, broke his bonds and made straight for the open country.
LITTLE MAUD
By CHARLES BATTELL LOOMIS
This delightful story by Mr. Loomis is known to millions of English-speaking people
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