The Stolen White Elephant | Page 6

Mark Twain
he has
turned eastward again."
Yet further troublous news was in store for us. The telegraph brought
this:
HOGANSPORT, 12.19. Just arrived. Elephant passed through half an
hour ago, creating wildest fright and excitement. Elephant raged around
streets; two plumbers going by, killed one--other escaped. Regret
general. O'FLAHERTY, Detective.
"Now he is right in the midst of my men," said the inspector. "Nothing
can save him."
A succession of telegrams came from detectives who were scattered
through New Jersey and Pennsylvania, and who were following clues
consisting of ravaged barns, factories, and Sunday-school libraries,
with high hopes-hopes amounting to certainties, indeed. The inspector
said:
"I wish I could communicate with them and order them north, but that
is impossible. A detective only visits a telegraph office to send his
report; then he is off again, and you don't know where to put your hand
on him."

Now came this despatch:
BRIDGEPORT, CT., 12.15. Barnum offers rate of $4,000 a year for
exclusive privilege of using elephant as traveling advertising medium
from now till detectives find him. Wants to paste circus-posters on him.
Desires immediate answer. BOGGS, Detective.
"That is perfectly absurd!" I exclaimed.
"Of course it is," said the inspector. "Evidently Mr. Barnum, who
thinks he is so sharp, does not know me--but I know him."
Then he dictated this answer to the despatch:
Mr. Barnum's offer declined. Make it $7,000 or nothing. Chief
BLUNT.
"There. We shall not have to wait long for an answer. Mr. Barnum is
not at home; he is in the telegraph office--it is his way when he has
business on hand. Inside of three--"
Done.--P. T. BARNUM.
So interrupted the clicking telegraphic instrument. Before I could make
a comment upon this extraordinary episode, the following despatch
carried my thoughts into another and very distressing channel:
BOLIVIA, N. Y., 12.50. Elephant arrived here from the south and
passed through toward the forest at 11.50, dispersing a funeral on the
way, and diminishing the mourners by two. Citizens fired some small
cannon-balls into him, and they fled. Detective Burke and I arrived ten
minutes later, from the north, but mistook some excavations for
footprints, and so lost a good deal of time; but at last we struck the right
trail and followed it to the woods. We then got down on our hands and
knees and continued to keep a sharp eye on the track, and so shadowed
it into the brush. Burke was in advance. Unfortunately the animal had
stopped to rest; therefore, Burke having his head down, intent upon the
track, butted up against the elephant's hind legs before he was aware of

his vicinity. Burke instantly arose to his feet, seized the tail, and
exclaimed joyfully, "I claim the re-- "but got no further, for a single
blow of the huge trunk laid the brave fellow's fragments low in death. I
fled rearward, and the elephant turned and shadowed me to the edge of
the wood, making tremendous speed, and I should inevitably have been
lost, but that the remains of the funeral providentially intervened again
and diverted his attention. I have just learned that nothing of that
funeral is now left; but this is no loss, for there is abundance of material
for another. Meantime, the elephant has disappeared again.
MULROONEY, Detective.
We heard no news except from the diligent and confident detectives
scattered about New Jersey, Pennsylvania, Delaware, and
Virginia--who were all following fresh and encouraging clues--until
shortly after 2 P.M., when this telegram came:
BAXTER CENTER, 2.15. Elephant been here, plastered over with
circus-bills, any broke up a revival, striking down and damaging many
who were on the point of entering upon a better life. Citizens penned
him up and established a guard. When Detective Brown and I arrived,
some time after, we entered inclosure and proceeded to identify
elephant by photograph and description. All masks tallied exactly
except one, which we could not see--the boil-scar under armpit. To
make sure, Brown crept under to look, and was immediately
brained--that is, head crushed and destroyed, though nothing issued
from debris. All fled so did elephant, striking right and left with much
effect. He escaped, but left bold blood-track from cannon-wounds.
Rediscovery certain. He broke southward, through a dense forest.
BRENT, Detective.
That was the last telegram. At nightfall a fog shut down which was so
dense that objects but three feet away could not be discerned. This
lasted all night. The ferry-boats and even the omnibuses had to stop
running.

III

Next morning the papers were as full of detective theories as before;
they had all our tragic facts in detail also, and a great many more which
they had received from their telegraphic correspondents. Column after
column was occupied, a third of its way down, with glaring head-lines,
which it made
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