The Romancers | Page 7

well worth listening to!
[BERGAMIN and PASQUINOT retire behind a tree.]
PERCINET. I love you.
SYLVETTE. I love you. [They stop.] Here is the famous spot.
PERCINET. Yes. He fell here, that big fellow, pierced to the heart.
SYLVETTE. There was I, like Andromeda.
PERCINET. And I was Perseus!
SYLVETTE. How many were there against you?
PERCINET. Ten!
SYLVETTE. Oh, there were twenty at least, not counting the big
leader.
PERCINET. Or thirty--there must have been!
SYLVETTE. Tell me once more how it was accomplished?
PERCINET. They fell--like cards in a row!
SYLVETTE. Our story should be put into a poem!
PERCINET. It shall be.
SYLVETTE. How I love you!
PERCINET. I adore you!
SYLVETTE. A realized dream. How my heart beats! I would never
think of marrying a commonplace little husband picked out by my
father!

PERCINET. Indeed?
SYLVETTE. No, no, not the way husbands are usually given to young
girls.
PERCINET. No, you would never have thought of marrying the son of
your father's best friend.
SYLVETTE. [Laughing] Indeed not. Have you noticed how our fathers
have lately--?
PERCINET. Yes, like two dogs.
BERGAMIN. [Aside] Hm!
PERCINET. And I know the reason why. This new arrangement is not
the best thing for their property. Our fathers are very good people, you
know, but they haven't much soul, and our brilliant adventure rather
throws them into the shade--
PASQUINOT. [Aside] How's that?
SYLVETTE. You see, they are fathers of celebrated lovers. Poor
fathers, how they have been deceived!
PASQUINOT. [Aside] Ha, ha!
PERCINET. Yes, fate has been with us!
BERGAMIN. [Aside] Ha, ha!
SYLVETTE. And to-night the marriage-contract is to be signed!
PERCINET. I must have musicians.
SYLVETTE. Then go quick.
PERCINET. I fly!

SYLVETTE. [Calling him back] I'll take you as far as the gate. [They
go up-stage, arm in arm.] We are at least as great as the most celebrated
lovers.
PERCINET. We shall take our place with Romeo and Juliet!
SYLVETTE. Aminta and her shepherd.
PERCINET. Pyramus and Thisbe.
SYLVETTE. And so many others! [They disappear, but their voices are
heard outside.]
Voice of PERCINET. Francesca and Paolo.
Voice of SYLVETTE. Petrarch and Laura.
[BERGAMIN and PASQUINOT emerge.]
PASQUINOT. See how well your plan has succeeded! Our children are
quite mad, thanks to you!
BERGAMIN. Your daughter, with her famous abduction, is most
aggravating.
PASQUINOT. Your son thinks he is a hero. He gets on my nerves.
BERGAMIN. But the worst of it all is that they think we are two idiotic
old fools whom they have deceived. I don't like it at all.
PASQUINOT. Why didn't you think of it before, wise man? I'm going
to tell them everything.
BERGAMIN. No, please don't do that--at least not until after the
signing of the contract. Let us not say a word until then.
PASQUINOT. Very well. But meantime, there we are caught in the net
of your own making.

BERGAMIN. But my dear friend, you admired the plan!
PASQUINOT. A fine plan, in truth!
[SYLVETTE enters gaily, with flowers in her hand. She waves to
PERCINET in the distance, then comes down-stage.]
SYLVETTE. Good-day, Papa. Good-day, Father-in-law to-be!
BERGAMIN. Good-day, daughter-in-law to-be!
SYLVETTE. My, my, what a bad humor you are in!
BERGAMIN. It's Pasquinot's fault--he--he--
SYLVETTE. [Waving her flowers in BERGAMIN's face] Sh! Please
don't quarrel. Of course, I understand, you can't behave quite as old
friends, and you like to quarrel a little, in a friendly way--
BERGAMIN. Of course, our hatred was so great!
SYLVETTE. A mortal hatred, too! When I think what you've said
about Papa--oh, dear! I used to sit by the wall and hear every word!
And to think you never once suspected that I came there to meet
Percinet--
PASQUINOT. [Ironically] Ah, I--
SYLVETTE. We came every day at the same hour. [To BERGAMIN]
Ha, ha, I can still hear Percinet telling you that he was going to
marry--"most romantically"! And he kept his word!
BERGAMIN. [Put out] Really? And do you think that if I had
wished--?
SYLVETTE. Now, now, now! I know lovers' dreams are always
realized, and that fathers who are mortal enemies always end by falling
into each other's arms.

PASQUINOT. Oh, let me laugh!
SYLVETTE. But we proved it!
BERGAMIN. I could say something--
SYLVETTE. What?
BERGAMIN. Nothing!
SYLVETTE. [To BERGAMIN] You seem changed. What do you
mean?
BERGAMIN. I mean--
PASQUINOT. Why, with one word, we could-- [Aside] I can't tell her!
[He walks up-stage two or three steps.]
SYLVETTE. Well, if you have nothing to say, why not keep still?
PASQUINOT. [Angrily] Keep still? Nothing to say? Do you imagine
that everything just happened? How do you think people could come
into my park through the iron gates?
BERGAMIN. Do you imagine for one instant that young ladies are
carried off like that nowadays?
SYLVETTE. Do