The Poems of Jonathan Swift, D.D., Volume 2 | Page 5

ask'd her what she thought,?Whether the red or green were best,?And what they cost? Vanessa guess'd?As came into her fancy first;?Named half the rates, and liked the worst.?To scandal next--What awkward thing?Was that last Sunday in the ring??I'm sorry Mopsa breaks so fast:?I said her face would never last.?Corinna, with that youthful air,?Is thirty, and a bit to spare:?Her fondness for a certain earl?Began when I was but a girl!?Phillis, who but a month ago?Was married to the Tunbridge beau,?I saw coquetting t'other night?In public with that odious knight!?They rallied next Vanessa's dress:?That gown was made for old Queen Bess.?Dear madam, let me see your head:?Don't you intend to put on red??A petticoat without a hoop!?Sure, you are not ashamed to stoop!?With handsome garters at your knees,?No matter what a fellow sees.?Filled with disdain, with rage inflamed?Both of herself and sex ashamed,?The nymph stood silent out of spite,?Nor would vouchsafe to set them right.?Away the fair detractors went,?And gave by turns their censures vent.?She's not so handsome in my eyes:?For wit, I wonder where it lies!?She's fair and clean, and that's the most:?But why proclaim her for a toast??A baby face; no life, no airs,?But what she learn'd at country fairs;?Scarce knows what difference is between?Rich Flanders lace and Colberteen. [2]?I'll undertake, my little Nancy?In flounces has a better fancy;?With all her wit, I would not ask?Her judgment how to buy a mask.?We begg'd her but to patch her face,?She never hit one proper place;?Which every girl at five years old?Can do as soon as she is told.?I own, that out-of-fashion stuff?Becomes the creature well enough.?The girl might pass, if we could get her?To know the world a little better.?(To know the world! a modern phrase?For visits, ombre, balls, and plays.)?Thus, to the world's perpetual shame,?The Queen of Beauty lost her aim;?Too late with grief she understood?Pallas had done more harm than good;?For great examples are but vain,?Where ignorance begets disdain.?Both sexes, arm'd with guilt and spite,?Against Vanessa's power unite:?To copy her few nymphs aspired;?Her virtues fewer swains admired.?So stars, beyond a certain height,?Give mortals neither heat nor light.?Yet some of either sex, endow'd?With gifts superior to the crowd,?With virtue, knowledge, taste, and wit?She condescended to admit:?With pleasing arts she could reduce?Men's talents to their proper use;?And with address each genius held?To that wherein it most excell'd;?Thus, making others' wisdom known,?Could please them, and improve her own.?A modest youth said something new;?She placed it in the strongest view.?All humble worth she strove to raise,?Would not be praised, yet loved to praise.?The learned met with free approach,?Although they came not in a coach:?Some clergy too she would allow,?Nor quarrell'd at their awkward bow;?But this was for Cadenus' sake,?A gownman of a different make;?Whom Pallas once, Vanessa's tutor,?Had fix'd on for her coadjutor.?But Cupid, full of mischief, longs?To vindicate his mother's wrongs.?On Pallas all attempts are vain:?One way he knows to give her pain;?Vows on Vanessa's heart to take?Due vengeance, for her patron's sake;?Those early seeds by Venus sown,?In spite of Pallas now were grown;?And Cupid hoped they would improve?By time, and ripen into love.?The boy made use of all his craft,?In vain discharging many a shaft,?Pointed at colonels, lords, and beaux:?Cadenus warded off the blows;?For, placing still some book betwixt,?The darts were in the cover fix'd,?Or, often blunted and recoil'd,?On Plutarch's Moral struck, were spoil'd.?The Queen of Wisdom could foresee,?But not prevent, the Fates' decree:?And human caution tries in vain?To break that adamantine chain.?Vanessa, though by Pallas taught,?By Love invulnerable thought,?Searching in books for wisdom's aid,?Was, in the very search, betray'd.?Cupid, though all his darts were lost,?Yet still resolved to spare no cost:?He could not answer to his fame?The triumphs of that stubborn dame,?A nymph so hard to be subdued,?Who neither was coquette nor prude.?I find, said he, she wants a doctor,?Both to adore her, and instruct her:?I'll give her what she most admires?Among those venerable sires.?Cadenus is a subject fit,?Grown old in politics and wit,?Caress'd by ministers of state,?Of half mankind the dread and hate.?Whate'er vexations love attend,?She needs no rivals apprehend.?Her sex, with universal voice,?Must laugh at her capricious choice.?Cadenus many things had writ:?Vanessa much esteem'd his wit,?And call'd for his poetic works:?Meantime the boy in secret lurks;?And, while the book was in her hand,?The urchin from his private stand?Took aim, and shot with all his strength?A dart of such prodigious length,?It pierced the feeble volume through,?And deep transfix'd her bosom too.?Some lines, more moving than the rest,?Stuck to the point that pierced her breast,?And, borne directly to the heart,?With pains unknown increased her smart.?Vanessa, not in years a score,?Dreams of a gown of forty-four;?Imaginary charms can find?In eyes with reading almost blind:?Cadenus now no more appears?Declined in health, advanced in years.?She fancies music in his tongue;?Nor farther looks, but thinks him young.?What mariner is not afraid?To venture in