The Peterkin Papers | Page 5

said the flavor
was pleasant, but not precisely that of coffee. So then he tried a little
calcium, aluminum, barium, and strontium, a little clear bitumen, and a
half of a third of a sixteenth of a grain of arsenic. This gave rather a
pretty color; but still Mrs.

Peterkin ungratefully said it tasted of anything but coffee. The chemist
was not discouraged. He put in a little belladonna and atropine, some
granulated hydrogen, some potash, and a very little antimony, finishing
off with a little pure carbon. But still Mrs. Peterkin was not satisfied.
The chemist said that all he had done ought to have taken out the salt.
The theory remained the same, although the experiment had failed.
Perhaps a little starch would have some effect. If not, that was all the
time he could give. He should like to be paid, and go. They were all
much obliged to him, and willing to give him $1.37 1/2 in gold. Gold
was now 2.69 3/4, so Mr. Peterkin found in the newspaper. This gave
Agamemnon a pretty little sum. He sat himself down to do it. But there
was the coffee! All sat and thought awhile, till Elizabeth Eliza said,
"Why don't we go to the herb-woman?" Elizabeth Eliza was the only
daughter. She was named after her two aunts,-Elizabeth, from the sister
of her father; Eliza, from her mother's sister. Now, the herb-woman was
an old woman who came round to sell herbs, and knew a great deal.
They all shouted with joy at the idea of asking her, and Solomon John
and the younger children agreed to go and find her too. The
herb-woman lived down at the very end of the street; so the boys put on
their india-rubber boots again, and they set off. It was a long walk
through the village, but they came at last to the herb-woman's house, at
the foot of a high hill. They went through her little garden. Here she
had marigolds and hollyhocks, and old maids and tall sunflowers, and
all kinds of sweet-smelling herbs, so that the air was full of tansy-tea
and elder-blow. Over the porch grew a hop-vine, and a brandy-cherry
tree shaded the door, and a luxuriant cranberry-vine flung its delicious
fruit across the window. They went into a small parlor, which smelt
very spicy. All around hung little bags full of catnip, and peppermint,
and all kinds of herbs; and dried stalks hung from the ceiling; and on
the shelves were jars of rhubarb, senna, manna, and the like.
But there was no little old woman. She had gone up into the woods to
get some more wild herbs, so they all thought they would follow
her,-Elizabeth Eliza, Solomon John, and the little boys. They had to
climb up over high rocks, and in among huckleberry-bushes and black
berry-vines. But the little boys had their india-rubber boots. At last they

discovered the little old woman. They knew her by her hat. It was
steeple-crowned, without any vane. They saw her digging with her
trowel round a sassafras bush. They told her their story,-how their
mother had put salt in her coffee, and how the chemist had made it
worse instead of better, and how their mother couldn't drink it, and
wouldn't she come and see what she could do? And she said she would,
and took up her little old apron, with pockets all round, all filled with
everlasting and pennyroyal, and went back to her house.
There she stopped, and stuffed her huge pockets with some of all the
kinds of herbs. She took some tansy and peppermint, and caraway-seed
and dill, spearmint and cloves, pennyroyal and sweet marjoram, basil
and rosemary, wild thyme and some of the other time,-such as you have
in clocks,-sappermint and oppermint, catnip, valerian, and hop; indeed,
there isn't a kind of herb you can think of that the little old woman
didn't have done up in her little paper bags, that had all been dried in
her little Dutch-oven. She packed these all up, and then went back with
the children, taking her stick.
Meanwhile Mrs. Peterkin was getting quite impatient for her coffee.
As soon as the little old woman came she had it set over the fire, and
began to stir in the different herbs. First she put in a little hop for the
bitter. Mrs.
Peterkin said it tasted like hop-tea, and not at all like coffee. Then she
tried a little flagroot and snakeroot, then some spruce gum, and some
caraway and some dill, some rue and rosemary, some sweet marjoram
and sour, some oppermint and sappermint, a little spearmint and
peppermint, some wild thyme, and some of the other tame time, some
tansy and basil, and catnip and valerian, and sassafras, ginger,