The Path Of Duty | Page 9

as quick and positive as mine; it all depends upon the way a thing
strikes one. But I will add to this another remark. I thought I was right
then, and I still think I was right; but it strikes me as a pity that I should

have wished so much to be right Why could n't I be content to be
wrong; to renounce my influence (since I appeared to possess the
mystic article), and let my young friend do as he liked? As you
observed the situation at Doubleton, should n't you say it was of a
nature to make one wonder whether, after all, one did render a service
to the younger lady?
At all events, as I say, I gave no sign to Ambrose Tester that I
understood him, that I guessed what he wished to come to. He got no
satisfaction out of me that day; it is very true that he made up for it later.
I expressed regret at Lord Vandeleur's illness, inquired into its nature
and origin, hoped it would n't prove as grave as might be feared, said I
would call at the house and ask about him, commiserated discreetly her
ladyship, and in short gave my young man no chance whatever. He
knew that I had guessed his arrière-pensée, but he let me off for the
moment, for which I was thankful; either because he was still ashamed
of it, or because he supposed I was reserving myself for the
catastrophe,--should it occur. Well, my dear, it did occur, at the end of
ten days. Mr. Tester came to see me twice in that interval, each time to
tell me that poor Vandeleur was worse; he had some internal
inflammation which, in nine cases out of ten, is fatal. His wife was all
devotion; she was with him night and day. I had the news from other
sources as well; I leave you to imagine whether in London, at the
height of the season, such a situation could fail to be considerably
discussed. To the discussion as yet, however, I contributed little, and
with Ambrose Tester nothing at all. I was still on my guard. I never
admitted for a moment that it was possible there should be any change
in his plans. By this time, I think, he had quite ceased to be ashamed of
his idea, he was in a state almost of exaltation about it; but he was very
angry with me for not giving him an opening.
As I look back upon the matter now, there is something almost amusing
in the way we watched each other,--he thinking that I evaded his
question only to torment him (he believed me, or pretended to believe
me, capable of this sort of perversity), and I determined not to lose
ground by betraying an insight into his state of mind which he might
twist into an expression of sympathy. I wished to leave my sympathy

where I had placed it, with Lady Emily and her daughter, of whom I
continued, bumping against them at parties, to have some observation.
They gave no signal of alarm; of course it would have been premature.
The girl, I am sure, had no idea of the existence of a rival. How they
had kept her in the dark I don't know; but it was easy to see she was too
much in love to suspect or to criticise. With Lady Emily it was different;
she was a woman of charity, but she touched the world at too many
points not to feel its vibrations. However, the dear little woman planted
herself firmly; to the eye she was still enough. It was not from Ambrose
Tester that I first heard of Lord Vandeleur's death; it was announced,
with a quarter of a column of "padding," in the Times. I have always
known the Times was a wonderful journal, but this never came home to
me so much as when it produced a quarter of a column about Lord
Vandeleur. It was a triumph of word-spinning. If he had carried out his
vocation, if he had been a tailor or a hatter (that's how I see him), there
might have been something to say about him. But he missed his
vocation, he missed everything but posthumous honors. I was so sure
Ambrose Tester would come in that afternoon, and so sure he knew I
should expect him, that I threw over an engagement on purpose. But he
didn't come in, nor the next day, nor the next. There were two possible
explanations of his absence. One was that he was giving all his time to
consoling Lady Vandeleur; the other was that he was giving it all, as a
blind, to Joscelind Bernardstone. Both proved incorrect, for