The Not | Page 7

at a party, she saw in him exactly
what she needed: someone with confidence about the future and a
sense of humour that drove all her fears away.
He was handsome, intelligent and driven, a successful lawyer eight
years older than she, and he pursued his job with passion, not only
winning cases but also making a name for himself. She understood his
vigorous pursuit of success, for her father and most of the men she
met in her social circle were the same way. Like them, he’d been
raised that way, and, in the caste system of the South, family name
and accomplishments were often the most important consideration in
marriage. In some cases they were the only consideration.
Though she had quietly rebelled against this idea since childhood
and had dated a few men best described as reckless, she found herself
drawn to Lon’s easy ways and had gradually come to love him.
Despite the long hours he worked, he was good to her. He was a
gentleman, mature and responsible, and during those terrible periods
of the war when she needed someone to hold her, he never once
turned her away. She felt secure with him and knew he loved her as
well and that was why she had accepted his proposal.
Thinking these things made her feel guilty about being here, and she
knew she should pack her things and leave before she changed her
mind. She picked up her handbag, hesitated and almost made it to the
door. But coincidence had pushed her here, and she put the bag down,
again realizing that if she quit now she would always wonder what
would have happened. She couldn’t live with that
She went to the bathroom and started a bath. After checking the
temperature she walked to the chest of drawers in the bedroom, taking
off her gold earrings as she crossed the room. She found her sponge
bag, opened it and pulled out a razor and a bar of soap, then undressed
in front of the chest of drawers. She looked at herself in the mirror.
Her body was firm and well proportioned, breasts softly rounded,
stomach flat, legs slim. She’d inherited her mother’s high cheekbones,

smooth skin and blonde hair, but her best feature was her own. She
had “eyes like ocean waves”, as Lon liked to say.
Taking the razor and soap, she went to the bathroom again, turned
off the tap, set a towel where she could reach it and stepped gingerly
into the bath.
She liked the way a bath relaxed her, and she slipped lower in the
water. The day had been long and her back was tense, but she was
pleased she had finished shopping so quickly. She had to go hack to
Raleigh with something tangible, and the things she had picked out
would work fine. She made a mental note to find the names of some
other stores in