The Miser | Page 9

a Turk we have here! That is more than twenty-five per cent.
LA FL. That's true; and it is the remark I made. It is for you to consider the matter before you act.
CLE. How can I consider? I want the money, and I must therefore accept everything.
LA FL. That is exactly what I answered.
CLE. Is there anything else?
LA FL. Only a small item.
"Of the fifteen thousand francs which are demanded, the lender will only be able to count down twelve thousand in hard cash; instead of the remaining three thousand, the borrower will have to take the chattels, clothing, and jewels, contained in the following catalogue, and which the said lender has put in all good faith at the lowest possible figure."
CLE. What is the meaning of all that?
LA FL. I'll go through the catalogue:--
"Firstly:--A fourpost bedstead, with hangings of Hungary lace very elegantly trimmed with olive-coloured cloth, and six chairs and a counterpane to match; the whole in very good condition, and lined with soft red and blue shot-silk. Item:--the tester of good pale pink Aumale serge, with the small and the large fringes of silk."
CLE. What does he want me to do with all this?
LA FL. Wait.
"Item:--Tapestry hangings representing the loves of Gombaud and Macée. [Footnote: An old comic pastoral.] Item:--A large walnut table with twelve columns or turned legs, which draws out at both ends, and is provided beneath with six stools."
CLE. Hang it all! What am I to do with all this?
LA FL. Have patience.
"Item:--Three large matchlocks inlaid with mother-of-pearl, with rests to correspond. Item:--A brick furnace with two retorts and three receivers, very useful to those who have any taste for distilling."
CLE. You will drive me crazy.
LA FL. Gently!
"Item:--A Bologna lute with all its strings, or nearly all. Item:--A pigeon-hole table and a draught-board, and a game of mother goose, restored from the Greeks, most useful to pass the time when one has nothing to do. Item:--A lizard's skin, three feet and a half in length, stuffed with hay, a pleasing curiosity to hang on the ceiling of a room. The whole of the above-mentioned articles are really worth more than four thousand five hundred francs, and are reduced to the value of a thousand crowns through the considerateness of the lender."
CLE. Let the plague choke him with his considerateness, the wretch, the cut-throat that he is! Did ever anyone hear of such usury? Is he not satisfied with the outrageous interest he asks that he must force me to take, instead of the three thousand francs, all the old rubbish which he picks up. I shan't get two hundred crowns for all that, and yet I must bring myself to yield to all his wishes; for he is in a position to force me to accept everything, and he has me, the villain, with a knife at my throat.
LA FL. I see you, Sir, if you'll forgive my saying so, on the high-road followed by Panurge [Footnote: The real hero in Rabelais' 'Pantagruel.'] to ruin himself--taking money in advance, buying dear, selling cheap, and cutting your corn while it is still grass.
CLE. What would you have me do? It is to this that young men are reduced by the accursed avarice of their fathers; and people are astonished after that, that sons long for their death.
LA FL. No one can deny that yours would excite against his meanness the most quiet of men. I have not, thank God, any inclination gallows- ward, and among my colleagues whom I see dabbling in various doubtful affairs, I know well enough how to keep myself out of hot water, and how to keep clear of all those things which savour ever so little of the ladder; but to tell you the truth, he almost gives me, by his ways of going on, the desire of robbing him, and I should think that in doing so I was doing a meritorious action.
CLE. Give me that memorandum that I may have another look at it.

SCENE II.--HARPAGON, MR. SIMON (CLéANTE and LA FLèCHE _at the back of the stage_).
SIM. Yes, Sir; it is a young man who is greatly in want of money; his affairs force him to find some at any cost, and he will submit to all your conditions.
HAR. But are you sure, Mr. Simon, that there is no risk to run in this case? and do you know the name, the property, and the family of him for whom you speak?
SIM. No; I cannot tell you anything for certain, as it was by mere chance that I was made acquainted with him; but he will tell you everything himself, and his servant has assured me that you will be quite satisfied when you know who he is. All I can tell you is that his family is