The Man Who Laughs | Page 6

At the back there was a
door with a practicable panel. By lowering the three steps which turned

on a hinge below the door, access was gained to the hut, which at night
was securely fastened with bolt and lock. Rain and snow had fallen
plentifully on it; it had been painted, but of what colour it was difficult
to say, change of season being to vans what changes of reign are to
courtiers. In front, outside, was a board, a kind of frontispiece, on
which the following inscription might once have been deciphered; it
was in black letters on a white ground, but by degrees the characters
had become confused and blurred:--
"By friction gold loses every year a fourteen hundredth part of its bulk.
This is what is called the Wear. Hence it follows that on fourteen
hundred millions of gold in circulation throughout the world, one
million is lost annually. This million dissolves into dust, flies away,
floats about, is reduced to atoms, charges, drugs, weighs down
consciences, amalgamates with the souls of the rich whom it renders
proud, and with those of the poor whom it renders brutish."
The inscription, rubbed and blotted by the rain and by the kindness of
nature, was fortunately illegible, for it is possible that its philosophy
concerning the inhalation of gold, at the same time both enigmatical
and lucid, might not have been to the taste of the sheriffs, the
provost-marshals, and other big-wigs of the law. English legislation did
not trifle in those days. It did not take much to make a man a felon. The
magistrates were ferocious by tradition, and cruelty was a matter of
routine. The judges of assize increased and multiplied. Jeffreys had
become a breed.

III.
In the interior of the van there were two other inscriptions. Above the
box, on a whitewashed plank, a hand had written in ink as follows:--
"THE ONLY THINGS NECESSARY TO KNOW.
"The Baron, peer of England, wears a cap with six pearls. The coronet
begins with the rank of Viscount. The Viscount wears a coronet of

which the pearls are without number. The Earl a coronet with the pearls
upon points, mingled with strawberry leaves placed low between. The
Marquis, one with pearls and leaves on the same level. The Duke, one
with strawberry leaves alone--no pearls. The Royal Duke, a circlet of
crosses and fleurs de lys. The Prince of Wales, crown like that of the
King, but unclosed.
"The Duke is a most high and most puissant prince, the Marquis and
Earl most noble and puissant lord, the Viscount noble and puissant lord,
the Baron a trusty lord. The Duke is his Grace; the other Peers their
Lordships. Most honourable is higher than right honourable.
"Lords who are peers are lords in their own right. Lords who are not
peers are lords by courtesy:--there are no real lords, excepting such as
are peers.
"The House of Lords is a chamber and a court, Concilium et Curia,
legislature and court of justice. The Commons, who are the people,
when ordered to the bar of the Lords, humbly present themselves
bareheaded before the peers, who remain covered. The Commons send
up their bills by forty members, who present the bill with three low
bows. The Lords send their bills to the Commons by a mere clerk. In
case of disagreement, the two Houses confer in the Painted Chamber,
the Peers seated and covered, the Commons standing and bareheaded.
"Peers go to parliament in their coaches in file; the Commons do not.
Some peers go to Westminster in open four-wheeled chariots. The use
of these and of coaches emblazoned with coats of arms and coronets is
allowed only to peers, and forms a portion of their dignity.
"Barons have the same rank as bishops. To be a baron peer of England,
it is necessary to be in possession of a tenure from the king _per
Baroniam integram_, by full barony. The full barony consists of
thirteen knights' fees and one third part, each knight's fee being of the
value of £20 sterling, which makes in all 400 marks. The head of a
barony (_Caput baroniæ_) is a castle disposed by inheritance, as
England herself, that is to say, descending to daughters if there be no
sons, and in that case going to the eldest daughter, cæteris filiabus

aliundè satisfactis.[1]
"Barons have the degree of lord: in Saxon, laford; dominus in high
Latin; Lordus in low Latin. The eldest and younger sons of viscounts
and barons are the first esquires in the kingdom. The eldest sons of
peers take precedence of knights of the garter. The younger sons do not.
The eldest son of a viscount comes after all barons, and precedes all
baronets. Every daughter of a peer is a