The Little Nugget | Page 2

Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
boy's portrait painted, as you only had one of
him, aged eleven--'
'This is Ogden, Lord Mountry. I painted this myself.'
His lordship, who had selected a chair that enabled him to present a
shoulder to the painting, and was wearing a slightly dogged look
suggestive of one who 'turns no more his head, because he knows a
frightful fiend doth close behind him tread', forced himself round, and
met his gaze with as much nonchalance as he could summon up.
'Er, yes,' he said.
He paused.
'Fine manly little fellow--what?' he continued.
'Yes, isn't he?'
His lordship stealthily resumed his former position.
'I recommended this fellow, Stanborough, if you remember. He's a
great pal of mine, and I'd like to give him a leg up if I could. They tell
me he's a topping artist. Don't know much about it myself. You told me
to bring him round here this afternoon, you remember, to talk things
over. He's waiting downstairs.'
'Oh yes, yes. Of course, I've not forgotten. Thank you so much, Lord
Mountry.'
'Rather a good scheme occurred to me, that is, if you haven't thought
over the idea of that trip on my yacht and decided it would bore you to
death. You still feel like making one of the party--what?'
Mrs Ford shot a swift glance at the clock.
'I'm looking forward to it,' she said.
'Well, then, why shouldn't we kill two birds with one stone? Combine
the voyage and the portrait, don't you know. You could bring your little
boy along--he'd love the trip--and I'd bring Stanborough--what?'
This offer was not the outcome of a sudden spasm of warm-heartedness
on his lordship's part. He had pondered the matter deeply, and had
come to the conclusion that, though it had flaws, it was the best plan.
He was alive to the fact that a small boy was not an absolute essential
to the success of a yachting trip, and, since seeing Ogden's portrait, he
had realized still more clearly that the scheme had draw-backs. But he
badly wanted Stanborough to make one of the party. Whatever Ogden
might be, there was no doubt that Billy Stanborough, that fellow of

infinite jest, was the ideal companion for a voyage. It would make just
all the difference having him. The trouble was that Stanborough flatly
refused to take an indefinite holiday, on the plea that he could not
afford the time. Upon which his lordship, seldom blessed with great
ideas, had surprised himself by producing the scheme he had just
sketched out to Mrs Ford.
He looked at her expectantly, as he finished speaking, and was
surprised to see a swift cloud of distress pass over her face. He rapidly
reviewed his last speech. No, nothing to upset anyone in that. He was
puzzled.
She looked past him at the portrait. There was pain in her eyes.
'I'm afraid you don't quite understand the position of affairs,' she said.
Her voice was harsh and strained.
'Eh?'
'You see--I have not--' She stopped. 'My little boy is not--Ogden is not
living with me just now.'
'At school, eh?'
'No, not at school. Let me tell you the whole position. Mr Ford and I
did not get on very well together, and a year ago we were divorced in
Washington, on the ground of incompatibility, and--and--'
She choked. His lordship, a young man with a shrinking horror of the
deeper emotions, whether exhibited in woman or man, writhed silently.
That was the worst of these Americans! Always getting divorced and
causing unpleasantness. How was a fellow to know? Why hadn't
whoever it was who first introduced them--he couldn't remember who
the dickens it was--told him about this? He had supposed she was just
the ordinary American woman doing Europe with an affectionate
dollar-dispensing husband in the background somewhere.
'Er--' he said. It was all he could find to say.
'And--and the court,' said Mrs Ford, between her teeth, 'gave him the
custody of Ogden.'
Lord Mountry, pink with embarrassment, gurgled sympathetically.
'Since then I have not seen Ogden. That was why I was interested when
you mentioned your friend Mr Stanborough. It struck me that Mr Ford
could hardly object to my having a portrait of my son painted at my
own expense. Nor do I suppose that he will, when--if the matter is put
to him. But, well, you see it would be premature to make any

arrangements at present for having the picture painted on our yacht
trip.'
'I'm afraid it knocks that scheme on the head,' said Lord Mountry
mournfully.
'Not necessarily.'
'Eh?'
'I don't want to make plans yet, but--it is possible that Ogden may be
with us after all. Something may be--arranged.'
'You think you may be able to bring him along on the yacht after
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