The Life and Adventures of Major Roger Sherman Potter | Page 9

religiously kept by the villagers, the bright eyed damsels and their
chaperons, each in turn, shook me warmly by the hand, congratulated
my mother on having a son so daring, lisped words of encouragement
in my ear, and took an affectionate leave. Among them there was one
Altona Marabel, the daughter of a worthy fisherman. This damsel had a
face of exquisite beauty; and her great lustrous eyes and blushing
cheeks had caused me many a sigh. And now I saw that her heart beat
in unison with mine, for the words good-by hung reluctant upon her
lips. Nay, more, she would have sealed the love she bore me with a tear,
for as she shook my hand it came like a pearl in her eye, and she wiped
it away lest it write the tale of her heart upon the crimson of her cheek.
Neither the doctor nor the parson were disturbed at the departure of the
rest of the company; for they continued to praise the quality of the cider
and debate the question of law until my father went into a deep sleep,
from which he was disturbed by the parson, who, in response to an
invitation from the doctor, commenced singing a song for the
entertainment of my mother. Such joviality was uncommon with the
parson, and so surprised and astonished my father, that he intimated to
the doctor that it would not be amiss to get him home. Being something
of a wag, the doctor intended to vanquish the parson with the cider, and
then perform certain mischievous tricks with his features. But this my
father, who was not given to sporting with the weaknesses of others,
prevented, by ordering my mother to lock up the six remaining bottles.
"We might debate the question until daylight, but I could not convince
you," spake the parson, rising from his chair on finding the bottles
empty, and rather fussily adjusting his spectacles, "it is not expected
that law is a part of your profession."
The doctor being a well bred and courteous man, bowed and held his
peace. Indeed, he saw that the parson's intellect was somewhat
deranged; hence he held it more becoming a Christian to tender his
services in conducting him to his home, which was some two miles off.
The parson now took me by the hand, and having looked me in the eye
steadily for nearly a minute, addressed me as follows: "You, young
man, I am afraid, have got a dangerous turn of mind. Many is the
young man that has been hurried to destruction by a too daring and

adventurous spirit. But if your resolution to go out upon the world in
search of fame is not to be shaken by anything I say, then I would
enjoin you always to so fence up your character that the devil and
slander-loving editors cannot pick holes in it. Pray much. Let no one
tempt you with mild drinks, for such only lead to the taking of stronger
ones. Go regularly to church, but let not your eyes fall upon the faces of
pretty women so that your ears be sealed to the sermon. Never make
love to another man's wife. Remember this when you are a great man,
for with them it is become a fashion. Let ruffians go their own way. Let
gentlemen be your companions, and never fail to show them that you
can at least be their equal in courteous demeanor. Always pay your
washerwoman; be not ashamed to acknowledge your father, and
remember that the fonder you speak of your mother, the more you will
be beloved by strangers. Avoid politicians, who are come to be great
vagabonds, who drink bad liquor and give their thoughts to base
designs against the nation's gold. If you become great and valorous,
historians will no doubt defame you, and lay crimes of which you were
innocent at your door, as is common with them. But you must bear
what they say of you with Christian fortitude, remembering, always,
that it is a delight with them to tear greatness from its high throne." The
parson looked wisely in my face as he said this, and shook his head
warningly. "Most of all," he continued, "never permit yourself to fall
into the hands of treasury swindlers, money changers, and malicious
editors, who will set you up as the only fit person to be President of
these United States, though you have not a single qualification
necessary to the office. For they, being tricky men, will be sure to let
you down with the same facility they took you up; and when your
ancestors, down to the third and fourth generations are dug up, (as it
has become necessary to do,) and their character, together