The Letters of Elizabeth Barrett Browning, Volume II | Page 9

English atmosphere, I am much afraid. The lungs seem
to labour in this heavy air. Oh, it is so unlike the air of the Continent; I
say nothing of Florence, but even of Paris, where I do wish to be able
to live, on account of the nearness to this dear detestable England.
Now let me tell you of Wimpole Street. Henry has been very kind in

coming not infrequently; he has a kind, good heart. Occy, too, I have
seen three or four times, Alfred and Sette once. My dearest Arabel is,
of course, here once if not twice a day, and for hours at a time, bringing
me great joy always, and Henrietta's dear kindness in coming to
London on purpose to see me, for a week, has left a perfume in my life.
Both those beloved sisters have been, as ever, perfect to me. Arabel is
vexed just now, and so am I, my brothers having fixed with papa to go
out of town directly, and she caring more to stay where I am....
I have not written to papa since our arrival through my fear of
involving Arabel; but as soon as they go to the country I shall
hopelessly write. He is very well and in good spirits, thank God.
We have spent two days at New Cross with my husband's father and
sister, and she has been here constantly. Most affectionate they are to
me, and the babe is taken into adoration by Mr. Browning.
But here he is upon me again! Indeed, I have had wonderful luck in
having been able to write all this; and now, God bless both of you, my
dearest friends. Oh, I do feel to my heart all your kindness in wishing to
have us with you, and, indeed, Robert would like to see Herefordshire,
but--
[_The remainder of this letter is wanting_]
* * * * *
_To Mrs. Martin_
26 Devonshire Street: Wednesday, [September 1851].
My dearest Mrs. Martin,--I write in haste to you to tell you some things
which you should hear without delay.
After Robert's letter to George had been sent three times to Wales and
been returned twice, it reached him, and immediately upon its reaching
him (to do George justice) he wrote a kind reply to apprise us that he
would be at our door the same evening. So the night before last he

came, and we are all good friends, thank God. I tenderly love him and
the rest, and must for ever deplore that such poor barriers as a pedantic
pride can set up should have interposed between long and strong and
holy affections for years. But it is past, and I have been very happy in
being held in his arms again, and seen in his eyes that I was still
something more to him than a stone thrown away. So, if you have
thought severely of him, you and dear Mr. Martin, do not any longer.
Preserve your friendship for him, my dearest friends, and let all this
foolish mistaken past be well past and forgotten. I think him looking
thin, though it does not strike them so in Wimpole Street, certainly.
For the rest, the pleasantness is not on every side. It seemed to me right,
notwithstanding that dear Mr. Kenyon advised against it, to apprise my
father of my being in England. I could not leave England without trying
the possibility of his seeing me once, of his consenting to kiss my child
once. So I wrote, and Robert wrote. A manly, true, straightforward
letter his was, yet in some parts so touching to me and so generous and
conciliating everywhere, that I could scarcely believe in the probability
of its being read in vain. In reply he had a very violent and unsparing
letter, with all the letters I had written to papa through these five years
_sent back unopened, the seals unbroken_. What went most to my heart
was that some of the seals were black with black-edged envelopes; so
that he might have thought my child or husband dead, yet never cared
to solve the doubt by breaking the seal. He said he regretted to have
been forced to keep them by him until now, through his ignorance of
where he should send them. So there's the end. I cannot, of course,
write again. God takes it all into His own hands, and I wait.
We go on Tuesday. If I do not see you (as I scarcely hope to do now), it
will be only a gladness delayed for a few months. We shall meet in
Paris if we live. May God bless you both, dearest friends! I think of you
and love you. Dear Mr. Martin, don't stay too late in England this