The Lady and the Lord | Page 4

been right, because when I went back the next day Mr. Lewisohn was politeness itself, and after we'd talked for nearly an hour he took me out to lunch. I kept the carriage waiting all the time, and drove him back to his office afterward. It would never have done to seem worried about money."
"He didn't let you pay for the lunch, did he?"
"Of course not. But I had to pay for the carriage--or, rather, I had it charged up on my bill. I was getting so short of ready money that I was beginning to feel desperate. I hadn't enough money to pay my fare back to New York, even third class, by that time, because I'd been spending my ready money pretty freely in order to keep up appearances.
"I was seriously considering a visit to the hock-shop, and was wondering whether I'd got anything with me that an 'uncle' could be induced to lend money on, when who should come to stay at the hotel but a real English aristocrat--the kind you only read about in the Sunday paper, and never come across in real life.
"He was about twenty-two years old, with red hair and a pimply face, and simply oceans of money. It was he who saved the situation.
"Of course, he didn't carry the money with him; but you could tell he had it by the awful arrogance of his man-servant and the deference the hotel people paid him. You can always tell when a man's got money."
"How was it, then, that the hotel people couldn't tell that you hadn't any?"
"I'm not a man--I'm a woman."
"I see. Is there any way of telling when it's a woman?"
"Not unless you're a woman yourself. A woman can sometimes guess. But I'll never finish if you keep on interrupting so."
"All right; I'll be good."
"When his lordship came into the hotel and saw me in the lobby he stared harder than was polite; so I went up-stairs to my room and stayed there. But you can bet I didn't have dinner up-stairs.
"I got out my very best dress--the one I'd been keeping for emergencies--and came down just a little late--not too late, you understand--but late enough not to have to go in with the crowd. He was waiting about in the hall to watch me go in, and, though he didn't stare quite so hard that time, he followed me into the dining-room and sat down at the next table, with his back toward me."
"Beastly rude of him!" I thought I was wanted to sympathize, but I mistook my cue.
"I told you not to interrupt. He wasn't rude at all. He must have bribed the head waiter like a whole board of aldermen, because the man came over to me at once and said that my table had been reserved by some other people, and would I mind if I sat at the next table for that evening.
"He said that Lord Tipperary had the next table, but that he was sure that Lord Tipperary wouldn't mind. And he actually had the nerve to go to Lord Tipperary and ask him if I might sit at his table, just as if they hadn't fixed it all up between them before dinner.
"So I pretended to be rather annoyed; but not too annoyed, and changed places; and, of courses, the head waiter had to put some other people at my table, though there were several other tables in the room that were disengaged all through dinner; and in about a quarter of an hour Lord Tipperary and I were quite like old friends.
"It was the first time that I'd ever talked to a lord, and I found he was quite like a human being. I was never more surprised in my life. He didn't say 'Haw!' or 'Don'tcherknow!' like English lords are always supposed to; in fact, he didn't give himself any airs at all; but he used the most astonishing slang I ever listened to, and I don't think I understood more than half of it.
"After dinner we went out and sat together in the lobby--to watch the people, he said--but he was too busy talking to me to see much of what was going on.
"Of course, I had to be awfully careful what I said to him; and I was so busy puzzling out how to make use of him that I suppose I must have seemed rather absent-minded, and after a bit he noticed it and asked me if I wasn't feeling well. I had to say something, so I told him that I found English surroundings a bit depressing at first.
"He was an awfully nice boy, and he said at once that he knew a way to change all that. He offered to take me driving in his four-in-hand next