The Lady and the Lord | Page 4

course, then he couldn't help seeing the carriage and pair; I
was glad of that.
"Of course, I knew he'd telephone to Bertram before I had time to get
back to the hotel, but that didn't worry me; all Bertram could say was
that I had first-cabin labels on my trunks, and that I had engaged an
expensive room. Besides, he knew nothing against me, anyhow.
"I wasn't afraid of Bertram; and, as it turned out, I must have been right,
because when I went back the next day Mr. Lewisohn was politeness
itself, and after we'd talked for nearly an hour he took me out to lunch.
I kept the carriage waiting all the time, and drove him back to his office
afterward. It would never have done to seem worried about money."
"He didn't let you pay for the lunch, did he?"
"Of course not. But I had to pay for the carriage--or, rather, I had it
charged up on my bill. I was getting so short of ready money that I was
beginning to feel desperate. I hadn't enough money to pay my fare back
to New York, even third class, by that time, because I'd been spending
my ready money pretty freely in order to keep up appearances.
"I was seriously considering a visit to the hock-shop, and was
wondering whether I'd got anything with me that an 'uncle' could be
induced to lend money on, when who should come to stay at the hotel
but a real English aristocrat--the kind you only read about in the
Sunday paper, and never come across in real life.
"He was about twenty-two years old, with red hair and a pimply face,
and simply oceans of money. It was he who saved the situation.
"Of course, he didn't carry the money with him; but you could tell he
had it by the awful arrogance of his man-servant and the deference the
hotel people paid him. You can always tell when a man's got money."
"How was it, then, that the hotel people couldn't tell that you hadn't
any?"

"I'm not a man--I'm a woman."
"I see. Is there any way of telling when it's a woman?"
"Not unless you're a woman yourself. A woman can sometimes guess.
But I'll never finish if you keep on interrupting so."
"All right; I'll be good."
"When his lordship came into the hotel and saw me in the lobby he
stared harder than was polite; so I went up-stairs to my room and
stayed there. But you can bet I didn't have dinner up-stairs.
"I got out my very best dress--the one I'd been keeping for
emergencies--and came down just a little late--not too late, you
understand--but late enough not to have to go in with the crowd. He
was waiting about in the hall to watch me go in, and, though he didn't
stare quite so hard that time, he followed me into the dining-room and
sat down at the next table, with his back toward me."
"Beastly rude of him!" I thought I was wanted to sympathize, but I
mistook my cue.
"I told you not to interrupt. He wasn't rude at all. He must have bribed
the head waiter like a whole board of aldermen, because the man came
over to me at once and said that my table had been reserved by some
other people, and would I mind if I sat at the next table for that
evening.
"He said that Lord Tipperary had the next table, but that he was sure
that Lord Tipperary wouldn't mind. And he actually had the nerve to go
to Lord Tipperary and ask him if I might sit at his table, just as if they
hadn't fixed it all up between them before dinner.
"So I pretended to be rather annoyed; but not too annoyed, and changed
places; and, of courses, the head waiter had to put some other people at
my table, though there were several other tables in the room that were
disengaged all through dinner; and in about a quarter of an hour Lord

Tipperary and I were quite like old friends.
"It was the first time that I'd ever talked to a lord, and I found he was
quite like a human being. I was never more surprised in my life. He
didn't say 'Haw!' or 'Don'tcherknow!' like English lords are always
supposed to; in fact, he didn't give himself any airs at all; but he used
the most astonishing slang I ever listened to, and I don't think I
understood more than half of it.
"After dinner we went out and sat together in the lobby--to watch the
people, he said--but he was too busy talking to me to see much of what
was going on.
"Of course,