The King of the Dark Chamber | Page 9

some definite plan, then.
AVANTI. A plan is an excellent thing, so long as you are not yourself
entangled in it.
KANCHI. Hang it, who are these vermin swarming this way? Here!
who are you?
[Enter GRANDFATHER and the boys]
GRANDFATHER. We are the Jolly Band of Have-Nothings.
AVANTI. The introduction was superfluous. But you will take
yourselves away a little further and leave us in peace.
GRANDFATHER. We never suffer from a want of space: we can
afford to give you as wide a berth as you like. What little suffices for us
is never the bone of contention between any rival claimants. Is not that
so, my little friends? [They sing.]
SONG.
/* We have nothing, indeed we have nothing at all! We sing merrily fol

de rol de rol! Some build high walls of their houses On the bog of the
sands of gold. We stand before them and sing Fol de rol de rol.
Pickpockets hover about us And honour us with covetous glances. We
shake our empty pockets and sing Fol de rol de rol. When death, the old
hag, steals to our doors We snap our fingers at her face, And we sing in
a chorus with gay flourishes Fol de rol de rol. */
KANCHI. Look over there, Koshala, who are those coming this way?
A pantomime? Somebody is out masquerading as a King.
KOSHALA. The King of this place may tolerate all this tomfoolery,
but we won't.
AVANTI. He is perhaps some rural chief.
[Enter GUARDS on foot]
KANCHI. What country does your King come from?
FIRST SOLDIER. He is the King of this country. He is going to
command the festivities. [They go out.]
KOSHALA. What! The King of this country come out for the
festivities!
AVANTI. Indeed! We shall then have to return with a sight of him
only--leaving the delectable Queen unseen.
KANCHI. Do you really think that fellow spoke the truth? Anybody
can pass himself off as the King of this kingless country. Can you not
see that the man looks like a dressed-up King--much too over-dressed?
AVANTI. But he looks handsome--his appearance is not without a
certain pleasing attractiveness.
KANCHI. He may be pleasing to your eye, but if you look at him
closely enough there can be no mistaking him . You will see how I
expose him before you all.
[Enter the trumped-up "KING".]
"KING". Welcome, princes, to our kingdom! I trust your reception has
been properly looked after by my officials?
KINGS. [with feigned courtesy] Oh yes--nothing was lacking in the
reception.
KANCHI. If there was any shortcoming at all, it has been made up by
the honour of our sight of your Majesty.
"KING". We do not show ourselves to the general public, but your
great devotion and loyalty to us has made it a pleasure for us not to
deny ourselves to you.

KANCHI. It is truly hard for us, your Majesty, to bear the weight of
your gracious favours.
"KING". We are afraid we shall not be able to stop here long.
KANCHI. I have thought so, already: you do not quite look up to it.
"KING". In the meantime if you have any favours to ask of us
KANCHI. We have: but we would like to speak a little more in private.
"KING". [to his attendants] Retire a little from our presence. [They
retire.] Now you can express your desires without any reserve.
KANCHI. There will be no reserve on our part--our only fear is that
you might think restraint necessary for yourself.
"KING". Oh no, you need have no scruples on that score.
KANCHI. Come, then, do us homage by placing your head on the
ground before us.
"KING". It seems my servants have distributed the Varuni spirits too
liberally in the reception camps.
KANCHI. False pretender, it is you who are suffering from an overdose
of arrogant spirits. Your head will soon kiss the dust.
"KING". Princes, these heavy jokes are not worthy of a king.
KANCHI. Those who will jest properly with you are near at hand.
General!
"KING". No more, I entreat you. I can see plainly I owe homage to you
all. The head is bowing down of itself--there is no need for the
application of any sharp methods to lay it low. So here I do my
obeisance to you all. If you kindly allow me to escape I shall not inflict
my presence long on you.
KANCHI. Why should you escape? We will make you king of this
place--let us carry our joke to its legitimate finish. Have you got any
following?
"KING". I have. Every one who sees me in the streets flocks after me.
When I had a meagre retinue at first every one regarded me with
suspicion, but now with the increasing