The Golden Ass | Page 6

the residue. And turning to the other I sayd, You perhappes that are of an obstinate
minde and grosse eares, mocke and contemme those things which are reported for truth,
know you not that it is accounted untrue by the depraved opinion of men, which either is
rarely seene, seldome heard, or passeth the capacitie of mans reason, which if it be more
narrowly scanned, you shall not onely finde it evident and plaine, but also very easy to be
brought to passe.

THE SECOND CHAPTER
How Apuleius told to the strangers, what he saw a jugler do in Athens.
The other night being at supper with a sort of hungry fellowes, while I did greedily put a
great morsel of meate in my mouth, that was fried with the flower of cheese and barley, it
cleaved so fast in the passage of my throat and stopped my winde in such sort that I was
well nigh choked. And yet at Athens before the porch there called Peale, I saw with these
eyes a jugler that swallowed up a two hand sword, with a very keene edge, and by and by
for a little money that we who looked on gave him, hee devoured a chasing speare with
the point downeward. And after that hee had conveyed the whole speare within the
closure of his body, and brought it out againe behind, there appeared on the top thereof
(which caused us all to marvell) a faire boy pleasant and nimble, winding and turning
himself in such sort, that you would suppose he had neither bone nor gristle, and verily
thinke that he were the naturall Serpent, creeping and sliding on the knotted staffe, which
the god of Medicine is feigned to beare. But turning me to him that began his tale, I pray
you (quoth I) follow your purpose, and I alone will give credit unto you, and for your
paynes will pay your charges at the next Inne we come unto. To whom he answered
Certes sir I thank you for your gentle offer, and at your request I wil proceed in my tale,
but first I will sweare unto you by the light of this Sunne that shineth here, that those
things shall be true, least when you come to the next city called Thessaly, you should
doubt any thing of that which is rife in the mouthes of every person, and done before the
face of all men. And that I may first make relation to you, what and who I am, and
whither I go, and for what purpose, know you that I am of Egin, travelling these countries
about from Thessaly to Etolia, and from Etolia to Boetia, to provide for honey, cheese,
and other victuals to sell againe : and understanding that at Hippata (which is the
principall city of all Thessaly), is accustomed to be soulde new cheeses of exceeding
good taste and relish, I fortuned on a day to go thither, to make my market there : but as it
often happeneth, I came in an evill houre; for one Lupus a purveyor had bought and
ingrossed up all the day before, and so I was deceived.
Wherefore towards night being very weary, I went to the Baines to refresh my selfe, and
behold, I fortuned to espy my companion Socrates sitting upon the ground, covered with
a torn and course mantle; who was so meigre and of so sallow and miserable a
countenance, that I scantly knew him : for fortune had brought him into such estate and
calamity, that he verily seemed as a common begger that standeth in the streets to crave
the benevolence of the passers by. Towards whom (howbeit he was my singular friend
and familiar acquaintance, yet half in despaire) I drew nigh and said, Alas my Socrates,
what meaneth this? how faireth it with thee? What crime hast thou committed? verily
there is great lamentation and weeping for thee at home : Thy children are in ward by
decree of the Provinciall Judge : Thy wife (having ended her mourning time in
lamentable wise, with face and visage blubbered with teares, in such sort that she hath
well nigh wept out both her eyes) is constrained by her parents to put out of remembrance
the unfortunate losse and lacke of thee at home, and against her will to take a new
husband. And dost thou live here as a ghost or hogge, to our great shame and ignominy?
Then he answered he to me and said, O my friend Aristomenus, now perceive I well that

you are ignorant of the whirling changes, the unstable forces, and slippery inconstancy of
Fortune : and therewithall he covered his face (even then blushing for very shame) with
his rugged mantle